What super glue
is the most super? Let’s talk about that.( music playing )Good mythical morning. Today we are going to
stick it to the man. – ( grunts )
– And by man, I mean me. And by stick it,
I mean super glue me
to a wall. Yeah. After that, we’ll find
out if chocolate – is indeed going to be
extinct in 40 years.
– Hm. – I don’t know.
– But first, we’re going
to put some super glues to the test to discover
the very best super glue
on the market. It’s time for… Okay, so we’ve got
eight different brands
of the best super glues on the market. Yes, there are
at least eight different
brands of super glue. – Oh, I know.
– You know? I use ’em all.
I’m completely unbiased
coming in to this… – Okay.
– as any good judge
should be. Well, we will determine
a winner. To keep things fair,
all of these super glues
are multipurpose so they can be applied
to just about anything, and we’re gonna test
these in a tournament style of bracket-dism,
where two glues
go head to head and the best one
advances until we have a winner. Rhett: Let’s get to gluing. The original Super Glue
comes in a pack of two for $4.19. Rhett: And Elmer’s Krazy Glue,
a little bit cheaper, a pack of two for
$3.55. And on this packaging
it says, “Elegant and smooth finish.” And mine says, “Eye irritant.” ( laughter ) Okay, I don’t want to– – That’s not a good
– Go ahead. Irritate your eye with that. I will say that, the fact
that they have to call it “Original Super Glue”
means, somebody do a good job at
the trademark office. ’cause it could just
be Super Glue, but apparently,
they couldn’t hold on
to that one. We’re gonna glue
in the exact same way. Link: Boop, boop. Okay, we have allowed
them both to sit and dry, and the heads are
firmly glued. Just like new babies. And now we’re going
to undo all of that work. Now, I feel like
in order to be scientific, like, I should grab
both heads. And you should grab
whatever else part
of the baby – you want to grab.
– I don’t want to
look down the– You don’t have to–
Just grab it somewhere. And I think that
your left arm and my right arm,
and then your right arm, and then your right arm
and my left arm, technically should
have the same exact force,
right? – Yeah, science.
– Of course, yes, um… We just pull and increase
the force at exactly
the same rate. Right, and the head
that pops off first
obviously loses. Okay, and the crazy baby
is in my left hand, and the super baby
is in my right hand. I’m gonna be more
of an anchor. – Oh, gosh.
– I’m really gonna
grab these babies– but ( muttering ).
I’m putting a thumb right in your eye hole. – Three, two…
– Link: Gosh. – Rhett: one.
– ( both grunting ) – ( snap )
– Oh, yeah! – That went first.
– That one lost. Yes it did. Yeah it did. So, the “Krazy” baby
lost. The Super Glue really
is super. All right,
I’ve got Gorilla Glue. Uh, this is a pack
for $4.79. That’s over half
an ounce. This is a big, big
thing. Yeah, and I’ve got
Scotch Super Glue, which one pack of four
costs $3.59 and each one is single use which is smart because
if you forget to put
the cap on after a few seconds,
’cause you’re gluing
something, – you lost the whole container.
– Yeah, there’s a lot of
risk in this. – ‘Cause it glues itself shut.
– And is Gorilla Glue, like, compensating for
something with such
a big container? So much glue. – Who needs so much glue?
– Gorillas, man. Yeah, exactly!
You walked right
into that one. All right,
and we’re going
to be gluing snakes and planes together because “Snakes On A Plane.” But we’re not gonna do that
’cause copyright, – so we’re gonna put
planes on snakes.
– Okay, yeah. – So this is “Planes On Snakes.”
– Totally different! Okay, so just put
a big– let’s just go big
right here on this
little ridge. Okay.( snake hissing sound )– All right.
– ( imitates machine gun ) These things are
fully set and dried. How do you want
to do this to be
scientific – like we were the first time?
– Uh, parallel pulls. You want to hold
the snake or hold
the plane? I like to touch planes. All right, I’m a snake grabber. The Gorilla is gonna
be in my left hand. Yeah, same as last time. The one that is on
my side will always be
in my left hand. Turn the plane around
towards me. You want upside down
snake? Yeah, and then
I’m grabbing the… And you want me to
pull down? You want me to pull back? What you want me to do? – I could see all…
– Just pull. all these glue brands
are like, “These dill weeds.” ( laughs )
Here we go, okay. Three, two, one, pull. – Oh! Yeah.
– Oh! This one lost. – Yeah, but hold on…
–( ding )( stammers ) It’s happened
in the same way it happened in
the first round. But I gotta believe
it’s still equal though. Yeah, it’s equal. Yeah, ’cause your left
and my– ( laughs ) – Exactly.
– The most scientific part
of this whole thing – is my shirt.
– ( laughs ) – Let’s be real.
– So, Scotch… wins. Gorrilla loses. Loctite in the blue bottle $4.47 for this bottle here. Rhett: And Starbond– sounds like a condition
that a celebrity stalker has, is the largest bottle that
we have seen thus far. Two full ounces. But you gotta pay
$10.79 to get those. Link: All right, we got
some laptops here, we’re gonna glue these shut. And, um, because
this is the best method to prevent our kids
from being on screens. Yes.( squirting sounds )Okay, these laptops
have been rendered
useless. – Or have they?
– I don’t know. This is gonna be
tough here. – Now.
– There’s a– – There is a space to..
– Yeah, I can– – to get the fingers in there.
– I can feel that the fingers can go in so I’ll take
the thick side, and you take the thin side? – Yeah.
– I don’t know how we’re both gonna get our fingers
in here. Ooh! It is really
stuck on the sides. – Can you–
– All right, so… put it down on the table. And then… – Rhett: Maybe we should.
– Your hands– – Your hand’s kind of
in the middle.
– All right, hold on, hold on. This is going to get
a little too unscientific,
Link. I think what we should do
is that one of us, I can volunteer,
should do each one
of these. And just measure your
own internal strength meter. Okay, yeah, yeah,
yeah. Okay. – Okay?
– Go for it with
the Starbond first. I’m just gonna get my… Just get a good
feel for it. Gotta go to
the strength zone. What are you talking about? All right, I’m gonna
cross my eyes a little bit. Pop it! Pop it! Pop it! Pull it! Yes. – ( laptop cracking )
– ( grunting ) Come on, Rhett! – I’m wait– I’m–
– You volunteered! I’m redlining
in the strength zone
right now. ( laughter ) ( grunting ) Okay, hold on. Maybe I should– – No, maybe I should take
– Yeah, try that one, yeah. Redline and see
if it pops. Here, redline that one. That was Starbond, right? – Yes.
– Starbond’s strong. All right,
now redline equally. You got your–
Your face has to get
equally as red. Eyes have to be
as crossed. – ( grunting )
– ( laptop snaps ) – Oh!
– Oh, nothing! Nothing!
So easy! – Oh, wow.
– So easy. I got this $7.28 cent
bottle of Bob Smith
in front of me. You know Bob.
He makes super glue. – Yeah, he does.
– And it is the most expensive one per ounce
that we have. But the biggest one
is Glue Masters. That’s a little
presumptuous, – don’t you think?
– Maybe not. But this is for all
your gluing needs and for everyone
else’s gluing needs. because you’re not gonna
run out of glue with this big
eight ounce bottle that costs $25. And we’ve got my
favorite… –( music playing )
– Oh, Billy the Big Mouth Bass
singing… I got one of these
for my father-in-law– Shut up! Hit the red button
again. Oh, pull the battery out. What? Okay. Glad the batteries
weren’t super glued in. That’s enough of
that voice. Let’s glue some teeth
to these guys because, you know,
that’s what bass are
missing these days. I’ll be the bass dentist. Okay, there’s some
pliers over there. – Oh, yeah. That’s how I like
to pull ’em.
– You’re gonna do both of these. You gotta– you gotta
measure the internal
strength meter. – ( makes cracking sound )
– But you got to be delicate. I don’t think you can
redline on this like I did with
the laptops. – No, no, no, this is–
– You want me to hold
the bass? Yeah, hold the bass
a little bit, it’s gonna be ginger. Now open wide.
Here we go. – ( snap )
– Oh, I just broke the– Oh, basic–
You broke the tooth. – I broke the tooth off.
– You broke the tooth,
it is still glued. – Let me get lower.
– The glue has not failed yet. Oh, it’s so brittle.
How do I get this off? Maybe some twisting motion? Does that count as
the pulling of a tooth. I mean, it’s still
on there. – I mean, the tooth is still…
– Let me try the other one. Let’s just see if the–
see if Glue Masters
pops off. Do the same thing.
You gotta be scientific. Link: Yeah.
I’m gonna start ginger. All right. Ooh, that one’s on there. Ooh, that one’s
on there! – Oh!
– That one stayed on there
much better. I mean, it did ultimately
fail, of course but… – but there’s still
a tooth on there.
– Link: It’s still on there. Let me pull this. Gotta get all the parts
of the tooth. Look at that,
look at that! I can’t. Look, I got his
freaking lip. Ooh, you pulled
the freaking bass lip off. – Sorry.
– Okay, see if you can
pull the bass lip off of that one.
We gotta be scientific. Sorry Mr. Bass. Right now Glue Masters
are clearly in the lead. – No, I’m just getting–
– Yeah, the tooth is now
just coming up. – The tooth is just off.
– The tooth is off, uh,
completely now. – Uh, Bob, I’m sorry.
– Sorry, Bob. And Bass, I’m sorry
about your lip. Okay, for our
semi-final round, we are going to
pre-glue everything. So now we’ve got
previous winners, the Original Super Glue. And Scotch single use
super glue packets. You may not be
able to tell but
this is Chase. I let my hair grow out. – We have, uh, glued–
– Both: Combs… into his, “hair,”
and, uh, in the name
of science, I’m gonna get
behind you. Now, are you going
to try to comb through? I’m gonna grasp the combs
and I’m just gonna pull. Yeah? I’m gonna see which one
I can get out. Okay, easy, just be
even about it. And should I hold
the hair down? And for those of you
wondering, yes, I am symmetrical… – ( laughs )
– Do you need help? – Chase, hold your
– …as a person. – Hold my own hair?
– Chase, hold your hair down. – Okay.
– I’m just gonna– – I’m just gonna enjoy this.
– A lot of tension. Oh, God. Link: Oh, you’re pulling down. – ( faint groans )
– ( laughter ) The left one is giving
really, really easy. Like– and I’m stronger
with my right hand, but the left one
was just coming
super, super easy. The right one was just… – Well, there you have it,
– really, really tight. – You’re going out, Scotch.
– Yup, Original Super Glue
moves on. ( laughs )
The ultimate scientific
glue test. – The shoe test.
– ( laughs ) We’ve got our feet
glued together with Starbond
on these feet, – and Glue Masters.
– Link: On these feets! – On these feets. Okay.
– This has been done before but it’s– it’s–
never hurts to do it
again, right? Okay, now center
your feet. We got some spotters. Uh, you guys,
keep our chairs
from swiveling. and keep us from
dying, please. I feel like I’m in
a labor position. It’s like the opposite
of having a baby. ( hyperventilating ) I feel like my shoes
are gonna come off
of yours. Don’t do it.
Don’t let it happen. – Okay.
– Three, two, one. Start pull. – ( groaning )
– ( screaming ) ( both screaming
and groaning ) Link: Good gosh! Okay, okay. Mine are so close
to popping out. – It’s a lot. Easier to push in.
– Grab the top of your jeans. – Oh, yeah.
– ( laughter ) That’s good right there
okay. – Three…
– Both: two, one. ( both grunting
and screaming ) Gah! Ooh! Hold on, listen, man,
we gotta, we gotta be
on the same page. We gotta redline
at the same time, man. ( both screaming
and groaning ) Wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait!
Wait! Wait! – Let’s push toes together,
– Both: and pull heels out. – Okay.
– Both: Three, two… – ( both grunting )
– Ah! My– my– – Yes!
– That didn’t work. – Let’s grab the laces
– Oh, okay. – Pull with your arms.
– Okay. And pull your legs.
Three… Both: two, one, pull! ( grunting )
Uh! Gah! I hate these shoes! Your feet are too small. Let’s actually grab
the top of the shoes. ‘Cause we can actually
get our hands in there. – All right.
– And pull on three,
two, one. ( both grunting ) – ( Link growls )
– Rhett: They’re coming. – ( Link screaming )
– This one– first of all,
stop. This one’s releasing
more easily. That’s the thing
I’m noticing. ( grunting ) – Ah!
– Yeah, yeah, okay. So which one was this? Link left foot. – Starbond.
–( ding )– Starbond!
– Starbond lost. So Glue Masters
carries on. Okay, now for
the championship round, Original Super Glue… Versus Glue Masters. We have overalls
and the straps have
been cut at the top and then glued
back together with their respective
glues. We will have weights
added to our overalls – in ten pound increments.
– Mm-hmm. And the first overalls
to completely fail, both straps is the loser. – Yes.
– Bring in the weights, boys! Starting with ten pounds. You can take,
you can take the glue. – Oh, yeah.
– Okay. Right there at the front.
My straps make– – Oh!
– ( ding ) Ha! Ha! – You just lost.
– Okay, it doesn’t take much.( sad trombone )Ten pounds and my straps failed. Let’s see if we can do
another ten pounds on you. What a disappointment. I just want to see
how strong this, uh, Glue Masters is. Add it on. Oh! There’s one. You lost one strap
with 20 pounds. Now we’re going up
to 30 pounds. Add it over here. – Man.
– Rhett: It’s still holding! On the Glue Master
website, it says, “One Glue to rule them all.” And now we’re going
up to 40 pounds? ( exhales )
Add it. That strap is still
holding. Yeah! It’s starting to– – Fifty pounds!
– It’s starting to, like,
dig a ditch in my shoulder but who cares. – Oh!
– Oh! – It’s one of those
– Whoo! Congratulations,
Glue Masters! Get yourself a big
bottle of Glue Masters. And stick around
to watch me get stuck to a wall,
with super glue. Link:You wanna hear
something cool?The newest episode
of our podcast, “Ear Biscuits”is out today.Get it on iTunes,
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