I have a friend of mine who has been divorced three times so this friend of mine who at the time I was in my 40s he was 57 so he says I want you to go skiing with me so I said really I don't want to go skiing he said look you have not witnessed the feeling of going downhill with the wind in your face and the sound and the freedom of going down at this speed and it's just you and God and he started to rhapsodize this and I kept looking at him and I kept saying wonderful for you but I don't want to well he's one of these people you know they keep it up and they keep it up and they keep it up and he kept it up and finally I said okay I'll go with you I'll go with you on a Saturday oh great so he comes up and he says I'll take you over to the store to buy the stuff so I said ok so we go over this place all these sales people walking around with a tan wrinkled skin but but white white circles around look like negatives of Raccoon you know and they all have great white teeth great healthy-looking teeth said hey I said okay he said um why don't you sit down and we'll measure your foot and get you in a boot so I said to the fella I should do me a favor I don't want the most expensive I want the best he's no problem if you sit down and take off the shoes and the socks I said okay and then he brought a basket with some used sweat socks in them well there's a certain I think I could put on somebody else's used and worn just a few minutes ago underpants and it would not bother me as much somebody else's suck my toes drew back then this guy had never seen anything like it you know how a turtle's head goes in all of my toes went way back into the foot and he said I've never seen this before I said they don't want a used sock I said now if you get a pack of fresh sweat socks these toes will come back out so we put him on and he measured my foot so the fella comes back with a with a box and now we're gonna he's all right let's put your foot in well I'm not used to going into these blue things look like to sign II cinderblocks so so i go in i go in sideways with the foot turn push and he says now now just push hard and bang your heel on the jungle and then I'm in this is how you put a boot on so he fastens the thing and now my ankle is locked so do the same thing with the other foot in your locked and closed now what these boots have done is they've taken away my ankles I mean there's nothing that moves now except my knees so this guy said ok now stand up so I said but you just you just lock my ankles I don't I he said go ahead so I stand up I keep my knees bent because if I straighten my legs I know I'm gonna fall I need my ankles so he says he says now rock to rock to the left and I went to my left he said now rock to the right I went to ride he says now just make a circle and I I did like you know I made but but I was beginning to feel what he was talking about you know and I began to see myself out there you know I began to see snow slicing I was slicing snow left and right and I was made oh boy I was feeling and I named have poles yet you know so he's sitting now walk and then that's when it got funny because I have no ankles I'm just walking so he said just walk a little bit more now Rock elope and you know I love that part you know is that's gone and then I back up and he's just uh sit down so I said okay he said how do they feel I said I'm glad you asked and so now right here on this right foot right here in the middle of the foot there's a boom and the shoe is pressing this boom and it is really it is hurting man it is painful right there it's mashing that bone but up top here where the boot starts that's rubbing on my skin and and it's making it raw raw start now now on the other side of my foot where the big toe is well there's a bone there and it's it's mashing that bone I said an underneath on on where where my arches there's a blister coming up here okay now the other foot I said my little toe I don't know what happened but when I stamped down my little toe got mixed up and it's somewhere under my big toe the other three toes in the middle are really confused they're all on top of each other and there is a cut I think it's bleeding now I can I don't know because I can't feel anything because this other bone cut the nerve so everything is numb but up top here this is bleeding right away he said they fit well I'm walking around this place buying stuff man I bought some you have to have two outfits one is for your skin and the other is to cover up that part so I bought these skin type things and they would keep the heat of your own body in but not let cold into your body you understand what I'm saying so so so then you put on these other pants and they keep they block the cold from getting to the part that wouldn't let the cold in anyway so so you are insulated with your own body heat so you will never get cold and this and these are tight these things are tight and I put a top on that was tight and a jacket so that costs $1,700 you know but it wasn't the most expensive it was the best you know and I bought some sunglasses cost $600 that will will never let the Sun in the Sun will never never IQ can't see but but everybody says I look cool you know appeaser you know I really I don't know you don't even look like you're looking at me I said I'm not you know I don't know where and I bought some poles for the skis they cost $700 because they're special you know they won't leave your hand and I bought some gloves dayglo so that if I'm skiing in the street cars can see me when I'm coming and I paid $3,500 for the skis because these are new skis you don't have you never have to wax them they wax themselves there's a little motor on side West so I come out and with Lauren skiing and my friend is saying then are you happy that's yeah but I don't know anything about skiing so I put he helped me put the skis on top of his car and he's got you know he's got this little thing now so he stuck but you know what I noticed about little cars like that the heater is we're talking perseverance man we're talking about a heater I got these clothes on that are there already I'm 98.6 all all the way around I mean sweat is rolling off of me and staying within me and he's got this heater this little tune and this thing is kicking off it's about 105 and you can't turn the thing off if you do the engine will shut down they don't and I'm sitting in this guy's driving man and sweat is running down my face I about 5 pounds of sweat in the seat of my pants and and it won't go anywhere it's just simply I'm beginning to feel like a balloon you know water water balloon man I said you know these guys should have sold this to me with a law spicket just so that when it gets too much I can let it out you know present what is it just sweat don't bother but I do know that there's one thing that will break your concentration I don't care what you're doing and how good it is if a trickle of sweat runs down the middle of your back that will get your attention because you know where it's headed you know you what are you doing anything that this kept going down and and all this water is hanging it so I got on these sunglasses where nobody can you know can tell whether I'm looking you know so I had the window rolled down I was hanging you know trying to live man cuz I'm cooking myself and my in my own juices and people are driving past and everybody's passing us because this card I'm gonna tell you and you're not going to believe me and I don't care I don't care but I'm gonna tell you what I saw and it happened this car what about and then he went into third and the cousin and then it took a breath now I knew you wouldn't believe me but I don't care I don't care the Carson so we're driving and we pull in he pulls into a parking lot he says well we're here so I'd love to see where you know the people are skiing so I said well where are the people skin he said all of the you said we have to walk a mile I said in these boots so I don't want the guy to feel that well bill started with a bad attitude I want him to feel that once I say I don't like skiing that he's going to understand that I gave it a great shot so I said well here we go

Bill Cosby – Skiing (part 1)
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9 thoughts on “Bill Cosby – Skiing (part 1)

  • July 31, 2019 at 8:16 am
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    Reminds me of the first time I rode in the front of a toboggan. Here comes the trees.

    Reply
  • July 31, 2019 at 8:16 am
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    I love Bill Cosby! He's one of the truly great Americans. Thanks for everything!

    Reply
  • July 31, 2019 at 8:16 am
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    Bill Cosby is a National Treasure , He is being attacked by the radical left , piss on the commie pinko bastards , I love Bill Cosby

    Reply
  • July 31, 2019 at 8:16 am
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    The car took a breath!!!!

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  • July 31, 2019 at 8:16 am
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    Bill Cosby Himself
    http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0002B15I8/?tag=2014-1-20
    Love Bill Cosby! His early works are hilarious!

    Reply
  • July 31, 2019 at 8:16 am
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    HERE I GO DOWN THE SLOPE

    Reply
  • July 31, 2019 at 8:16 am
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    😀
    BEST.STAND UP.EVER!!!

    Reply

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