– My parents are working
on this big power source. Are we still looking for a
power source or anything? – Oh, for the palimpsest. – We could hook this bad
boy up to the new arcade. We could get this (beep)
palimpsest cracked in no time with the amount of juice
running through that place. You see that there is a
little video game console. It’s called Lucky Stones and you see that a little
half-ling girl (mimics chiming) appears on the screen
and goes, “Hi, I’m Penny. “Wanna play?” We got to call the shots
when they’re in here. – Can I see it? – Are you in, dude? ‘Cause you feel like a cool guy. – Dude, I am in. – Take a look, go for it. What do you think? – I take it, I pull my gun out on him. (laughing) (video scratching) (mystical chimes) (owl screeching) (growling)
(intense drumming) – Welcome back to “Fantasy High”. My name is Brennan Lee Mulligan. These are our intrepid heroes. Say hi, intrepid heroes. – [Players] Hi, intrepid heroes. – For now. (laughs maniacally) (Siobhan moans)
– We might not be intrepid after this? (Ally laughs) – We find ourselves at the arcade at the Elm Valley Mall. In the back room around
this giant power structure filled with glowing
crystals, Biz Glitterdew and Riz Gukgak face off. Last session, Riz pulled a gun. We are going to begin
with a Box of Doom roll. – What? – Already? – This is mostly in your guys’ favor. It is going to determine whether or not Riz gets a surprise round. – Oh, dope.
– On Biz. What’s going to happen is this. Riz, you’re going to roll deception. Biz is going to roll
insight, which is wisdom. His gets a minus one to this roll. – Okay, makes sense. He’s not good on picking up on cues. – And your deception is plus one. – My deception is, oh,
it’s deception, okay. My deception’s not great but– – Plus one. You need to get more than
less than two than him. – Okay.
– What? (dice clattering) – Yes!
– 14. (Emily cheers)
(group applauds) – All right. – Our old clueless friend Biz who thought he had a
true friend in Riz Gukgak is about to get shot. (Brian laughs) – I feel so bad for him. – No you don’t.
– Are you using your cool gun? – Oh yeah, using your dope–
– I am using my cool gun. Is my cool gun different? – Your cool gun is a magical weapon. – Dope. So I say, “All right, sorry
Biz, you’re a (beep) creep.” And then I’m gonna try
to insightful fighting. Try to get my sneak attack on him, so that’s a 18 Insight. It’s insight verse deception. – Gotcha. You do not get insight into Biz. (beep) – All right, I’ll just shoot him. (Lou laughs) – Shoot him point blank. (Brian sighs) – It landed on a corner. (die clattering) And I rolled a one. (beep) (mimics gun firing) – The gun (mimics explosion)
smoke comes out of the gun in your hand as ping ping ping ping you see Biz goes, “(sighs)
Man, I thought you were cool.” (blows raspberries) His
eyes start to spiral. (magical chiming) Glitter and color start to
ooze out of his fingers. Everybody in the arcade sees the walls (mimics distortion) undulate, sparkle, and an insane phantasmagoria
of rainbow color and endless space begins
to enshroud the arcade. Where the machines end, the lights begin, and endless sound and noise
occurs is beyond your conception as it turns into this chaotic wonderland. All right, time to throw down I guess! – Hey guys, Biz is a bad guy. – Yeah, no duh! – I thought he was just
a bad guy like he sucked, but he’s a real bad guy. – Duh.
– That’s going to be Gorgug. Your action. – Okay, can I make a perception check on – Yes. (claps)
– that case with the prizes? – [Brennan] Yes, you can. Go ahead and make a
perception check for me. – Okay. (die clatters) (moans) That is only a 10. – [Brennan] There’s some
stuff in those cases. Looks like some cool prizes and stuff. – Cool. (laughing) – There’s a sword and some sneakers and there’s a teddy bear,
a fun teddy bear prize, and there’s some Nerf bullets, there’s (beep) cheaper stuff. Little marbles and (beep) little jacks. – I’ll do it on my turn, too. – Take the freakin’ sword, dude. – I’m going, I kinda wanna
leave the sword for Fabian, so I’m just gonna go into a rage and run into the next room. – You enter a rage.
– Arcade. – Run into the next room, awesome. Go ahead and move your character. You now have a speed of 40,
so you can move eight squares in one movement.
– One, two, three, four. Five, six, seven, eight. – Eight, so that’s a movement action. If you wanna take another action, you can, or you can use a dash if you’d like. – I’m gonna dash. – Hell yeah.
– He’s gonna dash. – So that’s eight more. So one. Can I move through my friends? – [Brennan] You can move
through your friends. – Two.
– I’m gonna need you to make a charisma saving throw. – Why?
– Charisma? – Because of the phantasmagoria? – And being in a rage is not as help for. – Not as helpful for that. – Okay, so just (beep) zero charisma. Oh, nat 20!
(Siobhan cheers) – Yes! – Go ahead and keep moving, man. You are in a deep rage. Whatever was about to
happen does not happen. – (beep) Three, four,
five, six, seven, eight. – That’s you, that’s your turn. That is going to be, oh baby. You guys see that (sighs heavily) (laughs) we who gave our
lives here defend the master. (laughs) we who gave our
lives here defend the master. Woom, woom, ghosts leap from the (beep). (growls) Surround you, emerging from these. You see the ghosts are
dripping with ectoplasm, their coke bottle glasses
pushed up their nose, their pocket protectors full of pencils, little binders under their book, little references on t-shirts or short-sleeved button-ups. (laughs) You see, woom woom, two
appear on either side of you guys here. Go ahead and let me know
what Guardian of Faith does ’cause one of them is just–
– Yeah, so they have to that one that’s near it. It’s up to 10 feet, so what is that? One square or–
– Two squares. – Two squares. Okay, so I guess just
one of those is included. They have to make a
dexterity saving throw. If they fail, they take 20 radiant damage, and if they pass, they take 10. – Gotcha, okay. And what’s the DC on that? – 16. – 16, Jesus. (die clatters) And it’s a wisdom save? Or charisma? – Dexterity. – Oh, dexterity. None of the saves
would’ve mattered anyway. – I think it’s for 20. – Yeah, so it hits for 20 up to 60, so this is the first hit. – Oh, okay. That makes more sense.
– So it only lasts for a little bit. – You see that one of the nerds, this young woman who’s got
this little nerd t-shirt on, hair in her face, she goes, “(scoffs) Game on!” (mimics explosion) The
giant spectral corn says, “Chosen of the Corn Guard,
Kristen shall not be denied. “Feel the mighty glow of my kernels.” (mimics explosion) And this
ghost is partially shredded by radiant light. (screams) Oh, I’m not
supposed to be out in the sun! – Cool.
– Yo, I shout in, “Corn god sucks!” (laughing) – I kinda agree! – I like the scholars. (Ally laughs) – These ghosts are gonna
take some swings at you. One goes for Kristen. That’s gonna be a miss. One goes for Ada, what’s your armor class? – 12. – That’s a miss! (Siobhan cheers)
– Hell yeah. – (beep) duds. – Two are going for Gorgug. – What is happening? – They both miss. Two go for Riz.
– Cool. – [Brennan] Riz, what’s your AC? – 15. – One of these ghosts reaches out and shreds you for, oh, 23 points. and shreds you for, oh, 23 points. – Uncanny dodge. – 23 points of necrotic
damage against uncanny dodge. I’m gonna need you to make
a wisdom saving throw. – Okay. (die clatters) (sighs) Five. – One of the ghosts says,
“(laughs) If you die here, “you can be my pal!” And you are filled with such
a deep fear of that fate. (Brian cries)
You need more than anything to get out of this arcade.
– Got it. – That is not going to be Fabian. – Can I also do a perception
check on the rewards? – Yeah, you absolutely may. (die clatters) – 13. – Yeah, there’s some cool prizes in here. (laughing) Swords and shoes, a cool Frisbee– – Maybe that’s the ghosts
unfinished business is that they wanna win the prizes. (beep) Give them a prize, man. – Can I go take a look at the sword? – Yeah, you can go take a look. Well, yes, your perception check is taking a look at the sword.
– Great. – It’s the most expensive thing. It’s way up high. It’s this jet black little short sword that looks incredibly
shimmery and shadowy looking. It takes a million credits at the arcade. – God. I’d like it. (laughing) – Yeah. – Go for it. You can absolutely smash that thing. – Okay (stutters). – So you’re gonna take your
action to smash the glass. – Yes.
– Go ahead and give me an athletics check to
see if you can smash it without cutting yourself. (die clatters) – 16. – That’s fine. You elbow in your letterman jacket bam break the glass
(glass breaking) snatch the sword out of it. – Nice.
– It glimmers and shines in your hands. The little placard reads
“Ultimate Ninja Sword, “found in a for real ninja monastery “that my friend Trevon found out about.” – Trevon.
– That’s so long to write on a sword. – On a little placard. – My friend Trevon found it. – This real ninja sword
is 1 million credits. And it glimmers in your hand. – Fantastic. Is that? – That’s your action and your movement. You’re right there. So you guys still take another few feet of movement if you want. You can move three squares.
– Yeah, I’ll take it. One, two, three.
– Dope. That’s going to be Kristen. – Okay. I’m gonna cast Spirit Guardians
as a fourth level slot. – Awesome. – And just have (beep)
– Fantastic. – And that means I an extra D8. So I have four D8 of damage
to anyone who’s near me. – Jesus Christ. – That’s so much. (laughing) – Oh no! Wait, I didn’t have it. It has to be a three level slot because I only get one fourth. – Gotcha, no worries.
– So that’s three D8s, but still that’s– – Pretty sick.
– I’ll take it. – Kristen, you cast the spell. Do you move or no? You just cast the spell. ‘Cause you’re surrounding them right now. – Yes, and I would like to. I can choose any number of
creatures to be unaffected, but it’s obviously the party.
– Your pals, awesome. Adaine, that’s you. – Is this a wall? – Oh wait, sorry, I wanted to move. – Oh, you wanted to move, sorry. Where’d you wanna move to?
– Oh, I’m sorry. – My mistake. Just as far as I can towards Gorgug. Can we move into this blank space? – Oh, that’s why.
– This blank space is the undulating, weird
patterns of light and energy. You are unable to move into
that part of the arcade. There appears to be a weird, (rumbling)
the floor under you is almost buckling and looking weird like magic and power, basically. You take your movement. One, two, three, four, five, six. They’re gonna get the attacks
of opportunity on you. – Oh, which one? – Both ghosts will. Oh sorry, this ghost will get one on you and that ghost will get one on you.
– Okay, cool. (die clatters) – They both miss.
– Cool. – These ghosts are not rolling well. That’s going to be Adaine. – I would like to cast Dispel Magic on this hallucinogenic effect. – You’re looking at this magical effect. Give me an arcana check. – Okay. (die clatters) 24. – There are dozens of multiple distinct magical effects happening right now. So it’s not– – Okay, so it’s not just one spell. – Not just one spell doing it. – In which case, I will do something else. I–
– Can I yell in Elvish, “Let’s leave that game
where we found the girl “and let’s try to find
the rest of the girls “and let the…” – Dope. – What are you trying to say?
– Oh, they’re not inside yet. – I guess I’ll cast
Burning Hands on this girl who’s already damaged. – Yeah, go for it. – Great. Which is a dexterity saving throw for her. – She succeeds on the
dexterity saving throw. – So it’s three D6 half damage. – [Ally] Hell yeah. – One. – Five. – Six, Jesus, three damage. (Ally laughs)
Oh my god. – Take deep breath.
(beep) – What were you trying to say in Elvish? Because I would like to know. – We found a girl on this game. She’s trapped inside but we can run ahead and find the rest of the girls so that as you guys come in,
you can work on that game, but we can move forward. – Okay (hums) I might not do that. – And Adaine, I’m gonna need you to make a charisma saving throw. – Oh, goddamn it. (die clatters) 13. – 13 succeeds.
– Hell yeah. – Woo!
(Siobhan sighs) – That’s going to be Fig. – Okay. I would like to do two things. One, I’d like to do a
perception check on the– (laughing) – On the prizes? – One the prizes.
– Go for it. They’ve been checked. – 13. (laughing) – There’s some cool prizes. – The cases have prizes in them. (laughing) It’s a series of objects. There was a sword. It’s gone now.
– Hell yeah. – I would like to just grab
all of the ones I can carry. – Cool, you spend your
round just stuffing– – No, I would have to spend
my whole round doing it? – As many as you can carry, yeah, you have to be smashing glass and picking up as many of the things as you possibly could. – Describe them to me. I need to know if this is
(laughing) gonna be a good use of my time. – There’s nothing. – Is there nothing? – There is a teddy bear. There–
– I’m not gonna get that, I don’t think. (laughing) – Em, attack a ghost. – ‘Cause I’m about to make a big move. – There’s a teddy bear. – There was a Frisbee. – There’s a Frisbee. There’s a cool pair of sneakers. There’s some headphones. There’s a skateboard. There is a Frisbee. – Will it take my whole round
to just grab the skateboard? Or can I still do something else? – You’ll have to use an action to smash the glass and
take the skateboard. – All right, then, I don’t
know if this is the right, okay, I’m (groans). I’m gonna grab Fabian and I’d
like to teleport into here. – Cool, you want Dimension Door? – Yeah.
– Oh, (beep). – Same. – I’m going to be a bit
of a stickler right now. You have to know where you’re
going to Dimension Door. – I said I cased the joint. (Emily drowned out by Brennan)
– I’m gonna ask you to make a I’m gonna do you a solid
and say it’s an even 50-50 you went into that back room. So go ahead and roll me a D20. One through 10 means that you cased the outside and the front. 11 through 20 means that
you went all the way to the back room and
know how to get there. (Emily sighs) – 19! (Emily claps)
(Emily laughs triumphantly) – Your rolls are unbelievable. – [Ally] That’s so great. – Are you able to take
people with Dimension Door? – Yeah. – Dope. – I can take one person. – [Brennan] Rad, awesome. – So I run up, I grab Fabian,
and I say, “Trust me”. – What the (beep) are you doing? – (laughs) She’s winking the whole way. – Jesus, where the (beep), oh, oh, god. – And you guys arrive there. That’s going to be… – I don’t know if that was right, guys. What if we needed something from– – I mean, I did grab the sword. – Yeah. Oh and when I land, we get–
– I have Destroy Undead, which I think
– When I land, – will work on this
– all we get are Riz. – Oh, thank you, that is–
– I’d wait for them to rack up. – I am scared right now. – Cool. I am going to need… Biz rushes one hand over here
(mimics sound distortion), touches the pillar, and
you hear (chimes beaming) “Katya downloading”
(mimics sound distortion). And that’s what you hear. – You know Katya, she was
in Penelope’s pictures. – We saw Katya.
– She’s in a game. – She’s already in a game. – Is that the one that you guys saw or did we see Katya? – We saw Katya.
– You guys saw Katya. – (beep) – Oh no, you’re still there. – I think that’s bad.
– I am going to need– – What? – I am then going to need Fabian and Fig to make wisdom saving throws. – This is bad. – This is really bad. – Ah, 16. – 14. – You see that Biz flies
straight up to the ceiling. Goes, “Hey, I’m just
trying to have a good time “with my friends and you
guys don’t seem to recognize “how much of a pal I can be.” (air spiraling) You feel your mind go (lips
trilling) absolutely crazy. You just see images in
your head of millions of Biz Glitterdew’s going
“Good time, buh buh buh buh, “good time buh buh, zhoom, buh buh boom “(lips trilling) good time!” That’s what’s going on in your mind. You resist that effect. – Amazing. (laughing) – The sword. – The power of the sword.
– Riz it’s gonna be your turn. – You are fully frightened.
– Got it. – So you have to spend your whole– – Do I get to make a saving throw? – At the end of your turn. – (beep) Okay. So then I’ll use Nimble
Escape to disengage. – Cool.
– And then I dash the rest of the way.
– One, two, three, four, five, six. I’m gonna need you to make
a charisma saving throw. – Well, where are you going? – I’m just screeching. (die clatters) 10 plus, you know what, I’ll
also use my Bardic Inspiration. (die clatters) (table slams)
(beep) you. – Hit well.
– 12. – Don’t blame it on the bard. – Don’t blame it on the bard.
– 12? – [Emily] Don’t blame it on the bard. – You run past Penny
Luckstone’s game that you saw. You look at it and you
go, “Hey, it’s me, Penny. “Come help me find coins.” (lasers firing) Bam! – What, what? – You are fully, you
disappear from the arcade. (mimics sound distortion)
You look at your body and your hands. You are made of light and pixels and you see an endless expanse of tunnels and coins spreading out
from you in all directions. You took your nimble escape. You took your movement and made it there. You have an action. (upbeat techno music) – I am gonna yell, “Hey, Penny, you here?” – It’s me, Penny Luckstone! Get ready to find coins
or else you’ll die. (electronic beeping) And she starts to run down a tunnel.
– Coins, we need coins. – Cool. I will grab some coins. – Cool. I’m going to– – Do you make a fierce–
– I think we need coins. – Let me investigate. I’ll use my action to investigate. A nat one. Brennan, a nat one. It’s a cool game. – You believe you may be
inside some kind of video game. – Oh, okay, cool. This is cool. This is a cool game. I love video games. – It’s gonna be Gorgug. – Okay. Can I make a insight check
on one of these games? – Yeah, make an insight check. – Surrounded by ghosts looking at a game. What is this, Dig Dug? – Oh, I got, what is my insight, 19. – You look at the games. You don’t know if
there’s a way to interact with these games in
particular to help people. They seem to all be wired
up to some central place here in the actual arcade. But you also notice that some of these appear to be glowing
malevolently, some of these games. – Cool, do I see one of those near me? – One of the malevolent games?
– Yeah. – Yes, there’s one right ahead of you that appears to be very dangerous. – Okay. Well, I guess first thing’s first. I’m just going to attack
the ghost in front of me. All right. (die clatters) All right, that’s a 19, my first.
– That hits. – That will be– – Go ahead and roll all
your attacks at once. – Okay. (laughs) Then the second one is just a 13. – Hits. – And then another 13. – All three hit. Go ahead and roll damage. – Nice.
– So first one D12 of five. Okay, so, oh that’s actually six-sided. A 14 on the first one. 13 on the second one. And 13 on the third one. – 40.
– 40. – [Brennan] You (beep)
this ghost right up. – These ghosts are bad. Not strong.
– Yeah. – I’m in hell right now. (laughing) I’m in hell Nick Arcade. (laughing) – What if knew that something
from the prize chest might California wrestle?
– We had three (beep) falls to let us know that. (laughing) – Cool, that’s gonna be the ghost’s turn. – Spirit guardians! – It’s not dead? – Spirit guardians! – Yes, no it is not dead.
– Damn. – Oh, I love the spirit guardians. – You see that these ghosts
are gonna swing at you. One of of them swings at you, Gorgug. It misses, another one swings at you. (die clatters) Misses again. And you see that both of them vanish. – [Ally] Whoa! – They’re dead?
– They go (laughs) fly into the wall. These ones take damage for
is it a 15-foot radius or no? – 10.
– 15-foot or 10-foot? – 10-foot on that guardian to fail. – This one’s going to roll. That one fails its saving throw. You go ahead and roll full damage. – It’s just automatic
damage, I think, right? 20 damage?
– About 20. – It says 20 damage
(drowned out by Ally)– – For the first time. So it can only affect
each ghost once, I think. – I’m talking about spirit guardians. – She’s over here.
– I’m over here. – Oh, you’re over there.
– She did it to the guys who disappeared.
– Oh, those other guys. But would it happen at
the start of their turn? – Yeah.
– Yeah. – It would, so one of them fails and the other one also fails so go ahead and the other one also fails so go ahead and roll damage for those two. They started their turn. – [Zac] The ones that were near me? – The one’s that were
near you guys over here. – Oh great, okay yeah. – So you still hit somebody.
– Does the one on the other side of me get hit? – 14. – 14 damage. The one that you really (beep) up, you see that a spirit appears next to you and says, “All that is
necessary for the triumph evil “is that good spirits do nothing!” (Emily laughs) Destroys that ghost.
– Yay! – (beep) one is badly (beep) up. How much damage was it again? – That was 14. – 14. Is also badly (beep) up. – But neither of them got killed? – No, one of them got destroyed. – Ha! What did it look like? What sense did we get to
their vulnerabilities? Just disappeared?
– I think they took 50 hit points already.
– Okay. – (mumbles)
– That’s going to be the rest of these ghosts. This one here is going to take Adaine. This one as well is gonna come in. That one now has to roll
for damage, as well. – So they have to beat 16. – Does not beat 16. – So it takes 20. (Brennan sighs) – (beep) up. – Clerics are good, guys. Believe it or not. (Brennan laughs) – They’re gonna take some
swings at Adaine. (beep) One of them hits for. – [Ally] They do a lotta damage. – 16 points of damage. (exhales dramatically) Reaching out and (gags) withering you. That’s going to be, I’m gonna need a wisdom
saving throw from you. – (beep) (die clatters) (hisses) 11. – You are filled with a deep–
– (beep). – I’m gonna need you to
roll for panic attack. – (beep) (die clatters) It’s plus wisdom, right? – Yep.
– 14. – You are absolutely petrified, – (mumbles)
– horrified by these beings. These two turn and go for Fabian. I’m gonna need Fabian to make, first one of them’s gonna
take a swing at you. Misses.
(Lou sighs in relief) I’m gonna need Fabian to
make a charisma saving throw. – That’s not covered by
Remarkable Athlete, right? – Nope. (die clatters) – 15. – One of them goes, “Wait a
minute, this guy looks rad! “I wonder what your controls are like.” (shouts) And attempts
to leap into your mouth. – Oh, (coughs) Christ! (laughing) – [Brennan] You dodge outta the way. – The sword. – That is the ghosts turn. It is now going to be–
– He just tried to leap into my mouth. – Fabian, that’s gonna be you. – So the one of them just
tried to leap into my mouth. Riz just ran off behind me. – Disappeared into an
arcade game behind you. – You also just teleported in. – And Biz is flying above? – He’s flying up above, yeah. – Okay (laughs). God. Can I attempt to flip over this ghost in hopes of getting closer
to this power source? – You can try to move through them. They’ll get attacks of opportunity unless you take a disengage action. – I’ll take the attacks of opportunity. – Rad.
– Whoa. (die clatters) – You go ahead and take
(die clatters) seven, eight, nine, 12 points of damage. I’m gonna need you to
make a wisdom saving– – (beep) There it was. (die clatters) (Lou sighs)
– Ah, (beep). (Zac groans) – Same of hers. – Two?
– Two. – We’re drying.
– You run into a daring leap. One of them grabs you
by the throat (gasps). You are filled with cold energy and you see it says,
“Actually, if you play a lot “of these games, they’re pretty fun.” And you are filled with unending terror. – Okay, yeah.
– And can do nothing but run. – [Lou] Great. – [Emily] I thought you got
to reroll ones and twos. – No.
– No, he rolled a three, but it was a minus one. – Four, five, six, seven, eight. – [Emily] Oh boy! – I’m gonna need you to take, 10, 11, 12. I’m gonna need you to make a
charisma saving throw again. – Oh my (beep).
– Bren. – 11. – You guys are magic. (groups shouts) (ominous electronic beeping) Welcome, player one. Fight! You see that one of the
young women, Antiope Jones, appears in front of you says, “Ha ha ha, let’s see what you got!” (beat boxes) And starts dancing. – Okay. What’s happening? Where am I? – That’s going to be Kristen. – All right.
– What’s happening? – I am going to run up to
this game, the glowing one. – [Brennan] Cool, I’m
gonna need you to give me a charisma saving throw. – And I get everything
added to mine, right? Wisdom or–
– You’re proficient in it. – You should bless some people. – Your charisma saving throw
is bubbled in right there. It should be plus six to
charisma saving throw. – Okay, cool. (die clatters) 15. – You rush past it. Where do you wanna go? – [Ally] To the game that’s (beep) up. – [Brennan] This has the (beep) up game right here.
– Oh, cool, then to that. – Yep, cool.
– There’s a few there. While I’m here, I’m just
gonna bless the three of us that I can see. So Adaine, Gorgug, and myself. – Hell yeah.
(mystical chiming) – And then I wanna check this game and see if there’s a way for
me to enter it or play it or try to get the girl outta there. – Don’t go in it! – Oh! What is that? Insight? – Insight, yeah. – [Ally] 13. – There looks like
there’s a way to go in it. You don’t know how safe that would be. You can either try to go into it, but you’re not necessarily
sure how to interact with it in a way from the outside that would help. – Okay, then I’m going
to yell to Adaine to get as close to us as she can ’cause– – No, I’m going, I’m running! – Okay, ’cause I can turn undead, but I’m just gonna wait
until we’re together and then help all of us.
– And they’re, yeah, for sure. – I’m gonna get as close
to going to the next chunk. Just be ready for us all to go
together so take a few more. – [Brennan] Cool, you get here
and see that there is a ghost just floating over here. (Zac groans) – Okay. – That is going to be Adaine. – I run away, don’t I? – You’re feared still, right?
– Aren’t I full of fear? – Oh yeah, you’re full of fear. Cool, well, the ghost that
hit you is on that side so go ahead and roll a D20. We’ll say one through
10, you flee the arcade. 11 through 20, you flee
in the opposite direction. – I’m gonna use my 15 divination roll – Nice.
– to run towards my friends. – Cool! (applauds)
– Oh yeah! – Hell yeah, do you take a disengage? – Hell yeah I take a disengage. (laughing) – One, two, three, four, five, six. Here you are with Gorgug. – Can you do a dash action?
– But I’m still afraid, right? – Still terrified, yes.
– You have the– – At the end of your turn you
can roll another saving throw to see if you stop being afraid. – Okay. – What are you doing? (laughs) – I just I guess ready at action. – You–
– I’m full of fear. I don’t really know what I can do.
– You disengaged, you ran. Now you can roll a saving
throw to try to stop that fear effect.
– Great. Then I’ll just do that.
– Oh, cool. (die clatters) – Seven. – You are still (beep). – [Brian] My god. – That is now going to be Fig’s turn. Fig, you’ve got this
crazy (beep) spell on you. I’m gonna need–
– Yeah so what does that mean? – I’m gonna need you to roll a D10 for me and tell me what you roll. – Oh my goodness. (suspenseful music) – Eight. – The creature uses it’s
action to a make a melee attack against a randomly determined
creature within its reach. If there’s no creature within its reach, the creature does nothing this turn. You just have to wildly
swing at that ghost. – Okay.
– Okay! – But then attack.
– That’s not so bad. – Nine. (laughs) – Just flailing.
– Not that any of your friends can see anymore, but Fig
is just in this room. Her eyes fully dilated,
swinging her bass guitar madly as Biz goes, “Yeah, yeah, yeah! “Everyone’s having a good time!” – Do I get to do anything
to snap myself out of this? – You may make another
wisdom saving throw. – Okay. No. – You are still trippin’ balls. (Emily groans) You see that Biz quickly
types in something on the base of the power pillar again and you hear (electronic
banging), “Danielle downloaded.” That is going to go back to
Biz at the top of the order. You see that Biz stays near
the device, casts a spell. Woom! Fig, you see out of
the corner of your eye, in all the hallucination,
that there appear to be many more of Biz than there were before. – There was already so many.
– There’s already so many. That is now going to be,
we’re going back to Riz. That’s you, you may roll
again for your fear. Or that’s gonna happen at
the end of your turn, sorry. – Great. – Cool, we’ll be seeing a lot
of the Box of Doom tonight. – Oh, hush up. (laughing) – In Penny Luckstone’s video
game, we find Riz Gukgak. Riz, you see that Penny
is streaking down a tunnel collecting as many coins as possible. What are you going to do? – (groans) Follow Penny, I guess. – You see that Penny’s
coin total is racking up. Yours is at zero. – I start collecting coins. – I’m going to need you to make an opposed investigate check. – Okay. – The game gets plus five. What do you get to do against this game? – [Brian] Plus eight. – You need to beat this game. – Okay. (moans) (die clattering) I got a 17. – You take a moment’s hesitation. You feel this intense fear all around you. Just like (hyperventilates). Penny ding, 100 coins. Sorry, better luck next time. (mimics sound waves) Fig, through the corner of your eye, you see a palimpsest in the device (gasps) with Riz’s face inside. – (beep) Oh my god. – Okay, explain to me which device. Where am I seeing it exactly? Am I seeing it in this device? – [Brennan] You’re seeing it
one of these pillars here. There is a palimpsest the
glows with Riz’s energy. – So this the source? – That’s the source right there. – The power source. Is this magical or non-magical? – Extremely magical. – [Emily] Mother (beep). – [Lou] Extremely sick. – What about these pillars? Are they magical? Pretty basic pillars just
made of glass and metal? – No, all extremely magical. – Okay. – That is now going to be Gorgug’s turn. – I’m gonna call my parents on my crystal. (laughing) – Okay, if you want that to
be your action, go for it. – (beep) – It’s actually not a bad idea. (crowd speaking over one another) Literally, anyone who’s gone in that room. – I have spirit guardians and
I could possibly protect us. We have this one little narrow spot. – Sure, I’m just trying to close that distance.
– No one else is going to it.
– So I’m gonna call my mom. – Cool, that’s your action. Do you wanna take a
movement that round as well? – Yes, I wanna move as
far forward as I can. – Cool. I’m gonna need you to make
a charisma saving throw. – [Lou] Oh no. – Oh god.
– I got this. (die clatters) 12. – Add your charisma modifier. – I have zero charisma. – You pick up the phone.
– (beep) – Hello? (vibrating) – I can’t stand this.
– Really? – And don’t like this at all.
– I hate this so much. – So we’re trapped.
(Brennan mimics sound distortion)
– Wow! – Oh, that’s a bad one. – Absolutely beautiful model. – [Emily] Really great
work, really great work. – [Lou] Really great work, but devastating as (beep).
– But I’m fur– – Absolutely furious.
– I’m so mad. – That’s very cool, but I’m so mad. That’s honestly super cool.
– (shouts) Hello? – Woop, woop, woop, woop! A bunch of little gnomes
start appearing everywhere. Hi, you wanna whack one of us? – Yes! (laughing) Can I use a frenzy or anything? – You got your action for your phone. That’s gonna have to
happen on your next (beep). – My god, I need. – At least it’s one I
think I will be good at. – Yeah? – That is now going to be ghosts. I’m going to need Fig to make
two wisdom saving throws. – Two. – Aren’t I already (beep)? – Yes!
– Okay. That’s gonna be an 11. A nat 20, baby! – Hell yeah.
– Rad. One of the ghosts attempts
to fly in your mouth. You successfully stop that. – (beep) I save this for Dr. Asha. – Wait, let me give it a shot. (shouts) And the second one leaps into your body. – (beep) My nat 20 doesn’t make my throat just push him back out
’cause I’m so powerful? Okay, yeah, of course. – Rad. – So what does that mean, he’s inside me? – You see this ghost goes one, two, three. – [Emily] (beep) I’m
so (beeping) hijacked. – (beep) I’m (beep). – That’s now. – [Emily] You’re just gonna– – Oh, that guy had to pass
the corn totem, right? – They’d both been hit by it already. – Oh, okay, cool. – They’re gonna take some swings now. Adaine, you take first. 13, 14 points of damage. And then you take next. 15, 16, 19 points of damage. – Jesus, 31 minus 19 is, 30 minus 18 so–
– 12? – 12, okay, I have 12 hit points. – That is now going to be Fabian. Bringing back out the
Box of Doom yet again. Fabian, Antiope Jones
looks at you and says, “All right, player, let’s
see what your skills are. “Time to dance!” You see that a series of dance moves begin to come streaming at you. – Damn it, I thought
this was a fighting game. (laughing) – [Emily] Wait, but you’re dexterous. – I am.
– You’re kind of a pretty boy. – I’m going to need you,
this game gets a plus five to its acrobatics. I will need you to roll acrobatics here. – All right. (dice clatter) I’m plus eight. – You (mimics exertion) all
right, love those moves! Great job, wow, wow, wow! Pretty cool! (chiming) (Emily cheers)
Fabian, you appear. – [Sibohan] Thank (beep) God. – Outside of the game. – And I’m still terrified. – And immediately have to
make a wisdom saving throw. – Immediately you have to keep running. One, two, three, four.
– I was (beep) joking (beep). – You’re still fleeing as fast as you can. You hear a voice go, “Antiope downloaded.” – Do I get to make a wisdom saving throw? – Did it say Riz downloaded? – It did not say downloaded, weirdly. You make your movement. You get another wisdom saving throw. – Thank god. – Do you have a (mumbles) disadvantage on wisdom saving throws? – (beep) – If we could all get within 30 feet, I could counter-charm us. – You’re so far away. – We’re so (beep) far away. – We’re so (beep). – Also, I’m under the
influence of two ghosts. – I have another divination roll. – I’m not sure what.
– But I keep on being like, “They won’t (beep) this one.” Ow, (beep). – That is now going to be, that’s Fabian, it’s gonna be Kristen. – Okay. (Emily laughs) – Help. – You didn’t even need your–
– You see Adaine surrounded by ghosts over there. – That’s the one that
gives people wisdom saving. – Cool. – You might wanna do it on Fabian. – Yeah, do it on Fabian. – Is it–
– Choose any number of– – Any number of creatures
– Oh, that might be – within range.
– Good to do to, you can also do it to Adaine.
– Do it all on of them. – To everyone. What is within range? – [Brian] It’s 30 feet. – [Ally] Oh, okay. – It doesn’t say what kind of script. It says choose any number
of creatures within range. For the duration, each
target has advantage. So just thirty feet around there? – Every creature is covered
by 30 feet right now. – Okay, cool, then I
will give both of them I’ll cast Beacon of Hope. – Which gives us advantage
on wisdom saving throws. – Advantage on them.
– Do I get it in the game? – Inside the game? – Oh, make– – While he’s in the game. – Go ahead and make a
knowledge religion roll for me. – Oh, okay, I have a definite. – And I think you have advantage on that ’cause of your book, right? Go ahead and beat a DC15 on knowledge religion for me.
– You have three. – 13. – And you have advantage.
– Advantage, so roll again. – Oh, cool. Oof.
– 13’s a better one. – 13, unfortunately you cannot get Gorgug while he’s in the game. But you can get those guys with
their wisdom saving throws. Do you take a movement
this round as well or no? – I run here. – Cool, gotcha, great, great, great. – So that they’re all in my thing. – Rad. And Gorgug’s in that game over there. I’m going to need Adaine to take her turn. – I’m afraid and I’m also trapped. So can I cast invisibility on myself? – To help you get out of there? – Just because I’m afraid, I can’t move. – Sure, go– – And this is a thing that
I can do that will make– – Help me get out of here.
– Help me get out of here. – Go ahead, make an arcana check. Call it a DC15 for you to
be good enough at magic that that feels intuitive for you to do. – Great.
(die clatters) Nope! – You just gotta run. – Great.
– Imagine if we ever (beep). – Kristen.
– Can I use Kristen as a– – You can fully disengage. – Just do a full disengage.
– I’ll fully disengage and then run towards Fabian, I guess. – Hell yeah.
– Yeah. – One, two, three,
– You guys are gonna run into each other scared
– four, five, six running the opposite way. – Are you terrified?
(Siobhan screams) (Brennan screams)
– And then I will do my wisdom saving throw with advantage. – You get it, yeah, cool. (dice clacking) – 21. – Sweet.
– Yes, you are no longer afraid.
(Emily cheers) You feel hope filling your body. You realize Kristen’s here. These dead things can’t stop you. Kristen’s died. She’s seen the golden corny gates. There’s nothing that’s
gonna harm you here. That’s now going to be Fig. Fig is currently possessed.
– What the (beep) happening? Possessed and enchanted and charmed. (Siobhan laughs) – [Brennan] Four, five, six,
seven, eight, nine, 10, 11, 12. – You’re possessed. You’re gonna attack us? – Just know it’s not me. – [Lou] I don’t know that. – I don’t know that. – Fig, I’m terrified. I just got out of a video
game that made me dance. (laughing) I was really hoping it
was a fighting game. I was like, “Oh, I got this.” – You got it. – Emily, could you say this in your most– – I’m Fig. – Sorry, Fig. Could you say this in your most threatening voice possible? (Emily laughs) – Sorry. Wow, lot of strong
feelings to process here. – Are you talking to me? – I don’t know, am I? – Yes, you are specifically
threatening Fabian with that. – I’m sorry, that was a threat? I’m terrified right now, but
that is honestly calming. (Brennan laughs)
(Emily wheezes) – That’s Fig’s turn. – Am I also still seeing Bizzes dancing? – You are no longer seeing Bizzes dancing. – Well, that’s a nice change. (laughs) – You are seeing your body. You can feel a ghost in your
body holding onto your heart and squishing it with its thumbs. (Emily squeals) – Oh god, oh Jesus.
– Going, “Oh wow! “Look at this! “You can make her do moves!” – Jesus Christ. – Oh god.
– There’s a creep inside you. – This is not right. – I have Hold Person
that I can cast on you. – You guys hear (mimics sound
waves) “Sam Downloaded”. And that’s going to be– – So I don’t do any kind of saving throw? – Nope, you are fully
possessed by this thing. – What was the one before Sam? We have Katya, Danielle. – Katya. – Danielle, Antiope, and Sam.
– Antiope. – (beep) tiope. (beep) – Dude, they’re downloading it to send. I guarantee they’re downloading it to send to someone more sinister. – Yeah.
– Sure. – I think that this little mother (beep) put them on the little crystal so he can feel like he controlled them as part of a deal to send
them to someone else. And those were not mains.
– And we have to stop them before they download all of them. How many girls were there, total? – Six.
– Only Penny. – I think it’s just me and Penny left. – You guys hear Biz casting
a spell in the other room. – [Lou] (beep) god. – That is now going to be, unfortunately, Riz, you feel yourself
trapped in this crystal. You can take actions while you’re in here, but it’s an infinite recurring fractal of crystalline space
that you are trapped in. (Lou laughs breathlessly)
– Cool. – Dude, piss in it. (laughing) – I guess I’ll do an investigate check. – Go for it.
– But I have a feeling it’s gonna be (sighs) 16. – You can feel energy moving
outside of the crystal and you can hear voices. You hear a voice of Ostentatia – Someone help!
– yelling out. Is that the wall?
– You hear the voice of Zelda yelling out.
– Oh, we’re trying to. – You hear Penny yelling out. – Hello, I’m over here.
– You feel a hand pressing up against the glass and you hear Penny’s voice saying, “Riz! “Riz, is that you?” – That’s me. I think we’re (beep). (laughing) – He says, “That’s terrible to hear.” – It’s good to see you, though. I did a bad job, but my
friends might save us. Do you have any clue
how to get out of here? Clearly you don’t. – Yeah, clearly I don’t. – Sorry.
– I don’t mean to be mean, but yeah for sure no.
– Yeah, no. That was a stupid question,
sorry, I just (beep) up. I (beep) up this whole (beep) fight. – Gorgug, that is going to be you. – Okay. – Bringing out the Box of Doom once more. It’s whack-a-gnome time. Gorgug, this thing gets
a plus five to its roll. You’re rolling with advantage and bless. – Okay. – Plus seven. – I’ll go ahead and roll
what you need to beat. (die clatters) You need to beat a 12. – Okay, okay. I feel good about this.
– Beat a 12, dude. – I have advantage. Yeah, 18. (Emily cheers) Plus my actual strength. – (beep) yeah.
– So 25. – In the video game, whoop whoop, (beep) little gnomes are popping up. Hey there, bud! Hey kiddo! Hey bud! Hey kiddo! – You’re not my bud! – Wham, wham! You guys see that this whole machine rattles from side to side. And bam. – Gorgug appears.
– I like to think that Gorgug just goes (mimics explosion)
and pops back out of it. (Zac groans) – [Zac] Like a snake thrower. – In order to pass that,
let me grab that from you. Is my die, great, thank you. – One of those is mine. (Zac screams) – That is now going to–
– It’s my turn? – Yes, you can move this turn, as well. – I’m just gonna start sprinting as far, my full movement.
– Full movement? Cool, that’s eight. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. You have to end your turn here or here because you can’t end your
turn on Fabian’s space. – I’ll stand in front of Fabian. – Cool. – Excuse me, I’m terrified. – Sorry. – That is going to be our ghostly friends. Beginning of their turn they have to roll. It’s a wisdom saving throw, yes? – Wisdom saving in 16.
– 16. – Hope they get so (beep).
– Three. – (laughs) They all fail. – Good.
– Yeah (beep) take it. – All right (beep). Yeah!
– Nice. – An eight, a seven, and a five. So that is 20.
– 20. – Jesus Christ.
– Each. And a bunch of them already
took 20 from my corn penis! (laughing) My floating cob.
– That’s still here. – Your army of philosophers, woom, comes to these nerd ghosts. You see one of them says,
“Actually, all of us are pretty “interested in philosophy, as well.” You see this sandaled,
extremely muscular, bearded, toga-wearing guy says,
“Philosophy is lived. “Do you live it or merely read of it?” They all go, “Well, mostly we read–” (shouting) Bwah! They are all shredded apart
by this one philosopher (beep) decking all of them.
– Sick. – Looking extremely injured. Kristen (beep) up these ghosts. – Yeah girl, go on, get it. – Hell yeah. – Is what I would say
if I wasn’t possessed. – But instead you’re like,
– But instead you’re like, – “Want to know a secret?”
– “I’m gonna kill you.” (laughing) – A lot of feelings to process here.
– Gonna turn undead on her and make her throw up that ghost. – That is going to be– – You’re gonna try and double possess me? – That is they’ve all
been terribly injured. You see, buh buh buh (whooshes). – [Emily] Make ’em (beep). – Hit me, baby, hit me. – I’m immune to fear.
– They fly through the walls. – Oh, your are, sick. – I’m immune to fear, right? – Oh (beep), mindless rage. – Yeah, baby. Mindless rage! – You are too mad be scared. – One of them hits you for 11, 14, 17 points of damage not halved. It’s (gasps) withering you from inside. And then 10, another 13 on top of it. – So 30.
– 30. – Wow.
– Worse. – But there’s no chance
for the fear to take hold. There’s no purchase. You are too flipping out to have any kind of fear effect work on you. – I’m at 88. (laughs) – I’m gonna need Kristen to
make a wisdom saving throw. – Oh wait, now I’m at 78.
– Cool, so I get my plus five to whatever I roll? – Yep.
– Your plus six. – 19. – You see that one of the
ghosts seeking to flee the army of philosophers around you attempts to leap into your mouth and is like, “Oh, come on! “Let me hang out for a little while!” And rushes forward. But you rebuff it, the light glows. It finds no purchase there. – Does it, okay nevermind. – That is going to be that’s the ghosts. Fabian, that’s you’re turn. – And I’m still trying to? So how does this work? – You’re gonna rush past these ghosts. You’re gonna get attacked some. Oh, actually, go ahead a roll a D20 Oh, actually, go ahead a roll a D20 to see if you try to
rush past these ghosts or see ghosts try to
turn the other direction. – Great. – G-g-g-ghosts!
– One through 10, you try to get through them. 11 through 20, you try
to go back the other way. – Scooby-Doo style.
– I don’t know, I think I– – Very much I believe I can
pass these ghosts no problem. – Also, or you were so scared of me that you’re just running. – I think it’s the ghosts.
– (speaks softly) 10, 11, 12, all three ghosts
are gonna get attacks on you. – Are you still feared if
you get your (beep) kicked if you get hit? – Yes, you are still.
– That follows. – You are gonna go ahead
and take first 12, 16, 19. You take 22 points of damage from one. – From one.
– And you take 12. And you take 18 from another.
– 18, a full 40. – [Emily] Jesus. – (sighs) As you’re just running. Come on, hang out, dude! It’s fun here! Hang in the arcade! – Can I call to the Hangman
to meet me at the arcade? – You absolutely may. Master, I’m on my way. – Fool!
– Awesome. – Go ahead and roll your wisdom. – Okay, here we go. With advantage, come on. (dice clatters) – Are you in our class?
– No. – 11. – You are still running, my man. – [Emily] No (beep)! – That is going to be–
– (beep) these rolls. – [Brennan] Kristen, that’s you. – Great.
– What’s wrong with you? – So for Channel Divinity, it’s up to 30. – Up to 30 feet. – How far is Fig from wherever? – If you get one, so it’s one, two, three, four, five, six. You can make it within
range of her right now. – Okay, cool. Then I’m going to run. – That’s gonna get an attack
on you, which he misses. – Cool, so then I run
here and I do Turn Undead. So will that get the demon out of Fig? – You feel like there’s a
good chance that it will. – I do it. – Yes, please.
– I do Destroy Undead. – Rad as hell. – Cool.
– These ghosts are too powerful to be destroyed,
but they may still be turned, which means they will attempt to flee. The DC on that is 16. They’re getting a plus one here. (laughs breathlessly) You see that these two
ghosts turn to look at you. What do you say to these ghosts as you’re starting to turn them? – I say, “My friendship burns bright!” (laughing) – You see they all go, “We don’t know anything about friends!” And begin to flee into these things. Fig, you (gags) vomit a full ghost. (Emily gags)
– Yes! – (beep) yeah. – But very metal.
– And also a little bit of a salami sandwich. – They’re too strong
to de destroyed by my– – Too strong to be destroyed
but they are compelled to flee. – Cool.
– Great. – That was an incredible
turn from Kristen. – That was great. – (beep) yeah. – Adaine, that’s going to be you. – Well, if they’re afraid, they won’t attack me?
– They will not take a reaction to attack you. – Oo, so they won’t
get opportunity attack? – Will not get opportunity attacks. – (beep) There is one you
can’t see that’s right here, I yell in Elvish. – How high are the ceilings here? If I fly, will any of them get an attack of opportunity on me? – They’re partially hovering, as well. They’re flying over. (Siobhan groans) – How you doin’ hit points wise? – I got 78. – Great! – I have 75, so take care of yourself. – Oh yeah, you should
be pretty hurt, right? – I’m pretty hurt.
– You got 12. – But I can get past this
woman without having her have an attack of
opportunity on me, right? ‘Cause I can go where–
– You go around her, yes. – Okay, so I am going
to cast Fly on myself. – Cool.
(ominous crashing) – Maybe very stupid, I don’t know. And I’m going to take a full
movement to get as close to Biz as I can.
– That’s 60, so that’s 12. One, two, three, four, five,
six, seven, eight, nine, 10, 11, 12. – It’s actually Fly, I have
16 movements, so it’s 120. – [Brian] Whoa. – You had to use the action to cast it. – I did, okay. – I’m gonna need you to make
a charisma saving throw. – Ah, (beep). – She’d pass advantage.
– You have advantage, right? – Not on charisma. It’s just on the wisdom saving throw. – You have bless.
– You still have one of those things?
– Yeah, I’m gonna use my 17 divination roll. – I think that’s a good idea.
– Against that charisma check. Please.
– You ignore that game calling out to you. Your eyes glow white with
the power of prophecy and divination. You continue flying. – Is it good to get into the game? – No.
– ‘Cause then we’d meet. – No.
– I am just wondering. – [Emily] Don’t go in the game. – When he won and I won, we just got out. That was all that happened. – Yeah, (beep).
– Just out. – All right Fig, that’s
gonna be your turn. – Okay, so I’m within
30 feet of both Adaine and Kristen Applebees? – That’s correct.
– And Gorgug. – And Gorgug.
– And Gorgug. – And Gorgug, but he
doesn’t need it, okay. Then gonna real quick tune my bass guitar. Seems like an inappropriate time, but I promise it’ll pay off, and then I start playing and I counter-charm me and
Kristen Applebees and Adaine. – (mimics bass reverb) With
this sick (beep) bassline that’s just (beep) on a tasty walk, – A tasty walk.
– who could be afraid? A tasty walk, dude. (Emily singing wordlessly) You see that all the
philosophers surrounding Kristen go like, “Verily, yes, yes.” – I got a verily! – Very funky, young madam. Funky, indeed.
– Thank you. Can I also– – But what does it mean to be funky? – We’re all smoking weed.
– That’s a conversation I’d love to continue. (Brennan laughs) While I’m playing, can I walk
backwards just to move closer? – Just (beep) moon walk, yes you may. – One, two, three.
– Can I take my entire walk backwards? (laughs)
– Four, five. You stop here.
– Okay. – Oh (beep). – Make a charisma saving throw.
– But now I got advantage, right? No, not yet. – Not yet.
– What does that mean? – Maybe I shouldn’t move at all. Or would I have to make it no matter what? – You would have to, it’s up to you. – You do what you– – Already past the game.
– If I stayed where I was, was I still gonna have to? – No, you were not if you
stayed where you were. – Okay, well okay. Charisma saving throw. Oh, okay, that’s better. Yeah, 24! – Oh, you’re–
– (beep) yeah. – This is nerd (beep). You don’t wanna play a (beep) video game. You’re playing a sick bass solo. It’s gonna be back to
the top of the order. You hear (mimics sound
waves) “Ostentatia” (beep). – Oh my (beep) god. (Emily whistles) – That is going to be back
at the top of the order. You see Biz is there, flies out here. – Oh (beep). – Hold on one second. That’s 60 feet. – [Siobhan] Oh no, 60 feet. – [Zac] Eef. – I’m going to need Fig and Adaine to make
dexterity saving throws. – We don’t get advantage, right? That’s not being charmed or frightened. – [Brennan] Nope. – 16, 17, 18. – 14. – 18 and 14, okay. – (speaks softly)
– Oh my god, so many dice. – I think I’m fucked.
– I have 12 hit points left so I’m (beep). – Oh my goodness. – No, you got a 17. – But she might get half damage. – If it’s half damage, I’m still fucked. – 14, 15. – 14, 15. – Biz sucks. – Biz (beep) sucks. – I guess he was right
all along, though, right? – That he sucks? – You take 39 points of damage. You take 18 points of damage. – I’m down.
– Sorry, 38 is fif– – Yeah, it makes no difference, I’m down. – 38 or?
– Good night everybody. – You see he goes and says,
“Well, two lovely ladies.” (mimics firing) And
rays of colors (hisses) and crackling electricity
come from all the games and badly damage you all. What is Fig at? – Fig is at, 39, 20, 26. – Fig is at, 39, 20, 26. – Fig is at, 39, 20, 26. (Brennan sighs) Super bad at math. – I’m also going to need Fig
can make an arcana check. – Oh, good. (laughing) 13. – Cool.
(Brian laughs) You see it is now going to– (Lou laughs) You see (beep) you hear a voice– – Wait, oh wait, he just hit me! Can I use my reaction, Hellish Rebuke? – You point your finger to
the creature the damaged you is momentarily surrounded
by hellish flames. – Whoa!
– Creature must make a dexterity save throw. It takes two D10 fire damage on a failed save.
– Freakin’ hell yeah. – It’s a reaction. – Yeah, you absolutely may. – Nice.
– He’s gonna make a dexterity save. – [Siobhan] Dope. – He fails! – Yeah (beep)!
– Or not Biz, not dexterous. – Okay, so then it’s two D10.
– What do you mean? – AV Club guy, not dexterous. – Six. Plus 10, 16! – Jesus Christ.
– Hell yeah. – So (blows air) you a (beep)
tasty lick on that bass. (shouts)
(exploding) And he is engulfed in flame. Whoa, I’m just trying to make a joke, god! – You’re so (beep). You’re so (beep), we have you now. Maybe.
– That’s going to be Riz. Back in the palimpsest,
you hear Penny say, “It’s getting quieter out here. “I don’t blame you. “Thank you so much for trying.” – We’re still gonna get out. Have you seen where any
of these girls have gone when they’re downloaded? – I don’t know. I’ve been stuck in the palimpsest. I think something really
bad’s gonna happen. Worse than you think. I’m so sorry, Riz, I’m so sorry. – It’s not your fault. – That’s going to be–
(Lou laughs helplessly) – Can I investigate and see
if I see where people are, look into the other palimpsests
and see if I can see where people are going? See if I see where Ostentatia
– Make another investigate check.
– went. (die clatters) – Nice.
– Nat 20. (Emily cheers)
– A nat 20? You furiously and you
take 7 points of damage You furiously and you
take 7 points of damage as you furiously dig through
the cracks of the palimpsest. Penny’s sad voice has lit
some kind of fire in you. (growls)
(glass breaking) And it’s literally lacerating you as you’re crawling through the crystal. You dig through and see a
channel (mimics vibrating) going back to the AV room at the Aguefort Adventuring Academy. (ominous music) – Mother (beep). – What an insane roll. But you know that’s where they’re headed, that’s where they’re going. – Okay. – That’s going to– – Can I try to lead people? I wanna try to overload their servers ’cause I hear them being downloaded. I wanna try to– – Go ahead and make an arcana
check off of that nat 20. – Cool. (die clatters) (sighs) 18. – 18, you guys here a
pop in the other room and Biz looks and says,
“Oh, what the (beep)!” and flies towards it
as something overloads in the (beep) server. – Just throwing
palimpsests down the thing. (glass breaking)
(laughing) – That’s going to now be–
– (beep) – (beep) Yeah. That’s gonna be Gorgug, baby. – Okay. Are these guys feared? – This one’s turned.
– They’re turned? – [Brennan] Turned, yeah. – So I could just move past that person? – Mm-hm.
– Okay. I’m going to take my full movement and I’m gonna put my headphones on and crank some music
as I run past the game. – (mimics bass music) Yeah! – ‘Cause hopefully it will keep me from hearing it.
– Just like Zelda would like. – Would that keep me from hearing it? – Keep you from hearing? – The game.
– Oh, the game. – Oh, the game!
– The call of the game. – I’m gonna say (beep)
roll with advantage. – Okay. – So that’s gonna be one,
– With my bless? – two, three, four,
– Wait, but he’s never frightened or charmed, right?
– five, six, – But that’s a wisdom saving.
– Seven. – Bring me to life.
– I can’t, that’s not charmed. Right?
– It’s charisma. – Charisma. So you can roll a charisma
save, you roll with advantage. You see can add that bless to it.
– With my bless? Okay.
(die clatters) Okay, so that’s 17. – You pass. – Okay, great.
– You should see it your crit. – Just see if you crit. (die clatters)
– No. – Cool, you’ve made it eight movement. You can continue to
move here if you’d like, but this is how far you
get based on that movement. – He’s run into the other room, right? – Yes.
– Okay. I’m gonna fully run into that room. – All right, I’m going to need you to make a dexterity saving throw. – With advantage.
– With advantage. – [Brian] Dope. – Thank god. Okay. – The first one was a three. – 19. – 19?
– Yeah. – Jesus, you run through here and see that Biz has set
up some kind of trap. You see pixelated versions of
yourself leap out to grab you and you fully jump with your music playing and go perfectly horizontal and corkscrew through the
middle of them (blows air) to land right in front of (beep) Biz. – ‘Sup, nerd? (laughing) – And that’s your action. That is going to be the ghosts. (whooshing) All these flee as fast as they can. This one’s gonna go one,
two, three, four, five, six, seven, she’s gonna go eight here. – Does Gorgug have an attack
of opportunity on him? – No ’cause it’s coming
straight toward him. Not leaving the area. And that’s gonna miss. Right here, it’s gonna be
one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. Not enough to get to Gorgug this turn. That is the ghosts round. It is now going to be– – Oh yeah, (beep), forgot that. – It is now going to be Fabian. – So I keep running. – Keep running.
– Oh my god. – Is your bike here?
– One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, 10, 11, 12. Give me another wisdom saving throw. (die clatters) – All right.
– Hell yeah. – 15. – You get to the front room and calm down. – Once you see the prizes. – Do a perception on the prizes. – Yes, and I’d also– – Do a perception on the prizes. – Yes, fantastic. – Please gat a nat 20 and we find out that’s
where it’s all from. – It’s a one. It’s not a nat one. – It’s a modified one.
– A modified one. – It looks like they’re prizes. That could be an illusion. Maybe there’s not prizes. – I got plans for my next turn. (laughing) I know that my friends
are in trouble over there. – That’s going to be
Kristen, that’s your turn. – Great. I sprint. – Cool. – How far can I get without using my
– One, two, three, four – five, six.
– running as an action? – [Brennan] You can get that far. – It’s about Healing Word or… Do a high level Healing Word. – You could do there and do a Healing Word or you could be over here,
whatever you wanna do. – Healing Word, could I do Adaine and her? – You could also dash and Healing Word ’cause Healing Word’s a bonus action. – (beep) yeah it is. So is Mass Healing Word. (group shouts)
– That’d be dope. – Yeah.
– Cool. – I wouldn’t mind some.
– I will do– – You can actually hit
you, I don’t know how many you can hit with Healing Word, but you can do Fig, Adaine,
Gorgug, and yourself. – Okay yeah, I’ll do that.
– Oh yeah. – Let’s see. Okay, I’m gonna cast
that as a, what is this? Fourth level. Oh, no no, sorry, third level. – Dope. – And so that gives me a D4 plus my spell casting ability modifier. – And then plus your blessed healer thing, so it’s plus 10. – Cool.
– It’s plus 11, actually, now. – [Brian] D4 plus 11. – D4 plus 11.
– Plus 11. – One. – So 12.
– So 12. – And then you also get some back from blessed healer, as well. – Yeah.
– How much? – I’m at full health, anyway, so 12. – 12 to Fig, Gorgug, Adaine, and Kristen. Kristen gets a little bit extra.
– Thank you. – I’m already at full,
I haven’t been touched. – These ghosts present– – I have not been touched! – Let me stand up. – Philosophy has helped me. – I’m now going to need you
to make a, as you continue, so you do that one,
two, here, three, four. I need you to make a
charisma saving throw. – Oh sure. – But she gets advantage – I get advantage, right?
– because of my counter-charm. – Yep.
– And bless. – No, this is not a charm effect. So just go ahead and roll
a regular saving throw with that bless. – Oh, okay. (die clatters) 12, oh charisma is 15. – You make it past. – Hell yeah.
– Boom boom. You make it this far.
– All right, great. – Hell yeah.
– Is Adaine getting up? – Oh yeah, Adaine gets up. Adaine, this is your turn. – [Siobhan] Oh, sick. – I’m worried about you.
– Well, my fly spell is gone ’cause it’s a concentration spell. I can see Biz from here, right? – Yes, you absolutely can. – Does he have spells
that he has cast on him? Can I do an arcana check? – There are four Bizzes
standing in that (beep) place. – Sick, I would like to cast
Dispel Magic on Mr. Biz. – You reach your hand out and voom, the other three loser doubles says (beep). He goes, “Oh, dag, what?” (Brian laughs) – Did you say dag? – Yeah, dag, dude. Ever heard of a bebe? – A what? – A bebe, a bebe. You know, on the internet? A bebe. – (beep) (laughing) – You suck so hard. Were there any other spells
on him, just that one? – Looks like I’m rubber, you’re glue. Whatever you say bounces
off me, sticks to you. – Oh my god. – Did you learn that from a book? Did you read a book of
insults and you were like, “I’m gonna learn that”?
– No, I learned it from a bebe. – A what? (laughing) – That is going to be– – Hot Topic nerds hate AV Club nerds. – Fig, that’s gonna be your turn. – Okay, I would like to,
so Gorgug I’m really sorry. I think that–
– It’s fine, it’s fine. I’ve got 90, I don’t care. – If I go one, two, three, four, five. This is as far as I can go. And then I wanna do– – I’m gonna need you to make
a dexterity saving throw. – Is this a charming of frightening thing? – Nope, not a charming or frightening thing.
– It’s that trap that I got through. – So counter-charm was garbage. Can maybe I do it, what if I’m here? Do I not? Where’s the trap start?
– You would hit it there. Well, you haven’t noticed it. That was what your arcana check was for. Was to see the spell there.
– Oh. Okay.
– So go ahead and make a dexterity saving throw. (die clatters) – 12. – You take 13 points of damage. – You take 13 points of damage. As a bunch of Figs leap
out from the arcade games and restrain you in the spot. (electronic whirring)
– So I don’t even get to do any actions? – No, I’m afraid not.
– This battle is (beep) me. (laughing) – (beep) to wanna be the
one where you were already, seeing all that stuff? One space forward, it’s
not that different. – Yeah, yeah, if that’s the case, I’d rather be (beep) one space further. (Ally laughs) – You guys see Biz goes ahead. He’s going to cast one,
two, three, four, five. He’s going to cast one,
two, three, four, five. I’m gonna need Adaine,
Fig, Gorgug, (beep), and Kristen to all make
wisdom saving throws. – Is it charming?
– We all have advantage. – Is it a charm advantage?
– This is charm, so this is advantage. – He doesn’t. – Does my feral instinct
help at all right now or no? – You are immune to charm. Your mindless rage is helping you here. – Oh, okay.
– Feral instinct, I think is an initiative thing.
– 16. – 20. – I got a 24. – 24.
– 20. – 16.
– Oh, sorry. Am I rolling on this? – Nice, guys. – You don’t even have to roll.
– Okay. – Not nat 20. – You see Biz goes, “You
coulda been my friends, “but you chose the path of pain.” Woo, woo, woo, woo, he starts
to shake his little tummy and you see that a bunch of spidery tendrils of color come out. Be charmed by my dance, be charmed. – You look so stupid right now. – It’s cool!
– That’s humiliating. – It looks cool!
– It’s not. – I take a video on my crystal. – (beep) DOn’t spread
that, don’t post that! – You’re recording him. – (beep) Embarrassing. – He flies over here. Gorgug, you’re gonna get an attack on him as he attempts to leave. – Great.
– Sick. – [Ally] (beep) ruin him. – Okay. 24. – That hits, go ahead and roll damage. (beep) – That’s 15. – Jesus!
– Chop (beep). – Adios, my dear. (banging) (screaming) Badly hurt. He rushes over to the
thing and you hear a voice and you hear Penny say, “I’m sorry.” Box of Doom is coming in. Riz, on that incredible nat 20, is in the system, man, we’re in. We’re hacking in. You’re gonna roll an opposed arcana check. – I actually have plus five.
– You have plus five. – Okay, cool.
(Emily laughs) – Biz has a plus eight to this. – Great. – You got it, man. – You got it!
– With Bless on the thing. – You got it, man.
– You got any guardic inspo left over?
– You got it, crit. – Beat this bull (beep) pixie. – Guarantee, guarantee. – Too legit to quit. – Eight to that is gonna be 21. – So I got–
– 16 or higher. – [Emily] Crit, you’re gonna crit. – [Zac] You got it. (beep) You don’t got it.
(beep) – You hear– – [Lou] You have it, it just
didn’t show up that time. – You have it, man.
– That’s true, that’s true. – Next time, man. – You hear Biz go, “Oh ho
ho, sneaky little monkey.” (Lou laughs)
– Ew! – Why are bad guys–
– You hear a voice say– – [Ally] I hate this. – You hear a voice say, “Bye, Riz”. (mimics swound waves) “Penny downloaded”. (beep) That is going to be Riz. You’re in the system running around. – Do you have anything in your bag? (beep) – Can it, paint it.
– I am going to try. Am I out of my palimpsest? – You’re deep in your palimpsest, but you’ve allowed yourself
to be injured to the extent that you are affecting stuff inside of the crystal technology. – Okay. Is there any way that I can try to, so I see that there are
people to the AV Club thing? – Yep. – I would like to try to
put the bag of holding over the wire thing so
people go into my bag instead of the little tunnel.
– Roll a sleight-of-hand. Because what you’re doing is insane and you are a (beep) ghost, that’s gonna be DC25
sleight-of-hand check. – Okay. – You have good sleigh-of-hand. – I literally can’t do that. I have a plus four. I can’t do that. – You can roll and see
if you get a nat 20. – Okay, don’t worry. (die clatters) – Nah. – 14.
– It’s 18. – You try to open it inside the thing. You see as you attempt to open it, the interior space of the
palimpsest starts going woop woop and it’s a holding technology inside of a holding technology,
that’s bad, close it. That is going to be Gorgug. (Lou laughs sadly) – Are my parents still on the line? – Yes. – If you can hear me,
what is the quickest way to shut down your power source? It’s an emergency. – Well, an emergency, I would
go the fuse box is usually in the front of the store of the arcade. – Oh (beep) me. (beep) me. – Really? – Is it just ’cause
it’s in the prize chest? – Can we even see one? – You can also just probably turn it off. – Okay, but if I can’t get there, can I just smack it? – Oh, I wouldn’t smack it. Mom and me put a– – My friend’s gonna die if I don’t. – Yeah, I would guess aim for the wires. – Okay. I’m going to let them get attacks. Can I get there in time? One, two, three, four, five. – Oh yeah, ’cause they can’t do (beep) to you.
– And then to the wires. No, no kinda (beep). – But they can’t charm
you or get in your mouth. – Can’t get in
– Get in your mouth – your mouth, dude.
and play your heart. – Get in your mouth. – Charm you.
– Let me tell you right now. They can’t get in your mouth. – You take 19 points of damage. – [Zac] Okay, yeah. – [Brennan] As you rush past them. – And I attack the wires. – [Brennan] Hell yeah. Go ahead and start rolling your attacks. – And I’m going to use Reckless Attack so I have one attack advantage. – Okay, awesome. (die clatters) – (sigh) The first one’s 9 plus 8, 17. – 17 does not hit. – Oh, okay. – Whoa!
– Doesn’t hit the wires? – [Brennan] Doesn’t hit the wires or doesn’t hit them in a way
that deals damage to them. – Okay, (beep). I’m gonna just do it again. – Wait, we should just unplug it. – I’ll tell you right now, this thing has – It’s magical.
– an AC of 19 and it has 20 hit points. That’s pretty common
for objects like this. – So you have 19. So just have to get over 19? – 19 or higher. – You can do that.
– I think I can. Oh, yeah, I got that. – Yeah!
– There you go. Go ahead and roll damage. – Okay (beep). Okay, that was six plus seven. That’s 13.
– 13 damage. You hack into the wire.
(electric fizzing) Electricity starts coming out of it. – And I have a frenzy
so I’m gonna use that. – Is Riz literally the next
person to get downloaded? – Yeah.
– I think so, I think so. (beep) – So we don’t try to heal
anyone this turn. (beep) Destroy this thing.
– That is only (sighs) fuck, seven plus eight. That’s not great. – You’ve badly damaged it. You’ve done a ton of damage. (electric fizzing) Shocking, electrocuting everywhere. These ghosts rush you. – (beep) – (beep) both miss terribly. That’s going to be– – But they get advantage on me. – Oh, they do get advantage. That’s an honest man. – Nat 20?
– Did he just crit? – They both crit? – Just both.
– They just both crit. (Lou moans)
– My god. – Why did I do–
– No! – How many dice you picking up, dude? – Don’t, dude.
– Put those dice down! – Put them down!
– No! – That’s the most dice I’ve ever seen. – Oh my god, he can barely
– This is a (beep) – fit them in his hand.
– Box of Doom roll. – Was that real?
– Yes. – 12, 13.
– What you just do? – [Brennan] 15. – Lie next time, dude.
– You wrote the rules. – 29.
– I cannot lie. – 42. You take 48 points of damage. – Yes, he’s still standing! – Man strong. – Jesus Christ.
– You’re so strong! (shouts) – You see both of these ghosts
reach their (beep) hands and try to crush your heart. Get a load of this dude! What a freak, freak loser! Squeezing your heart. You see that your eyes, the
corners of them crinkle, and a shock of your hair goes white. (Siobhan gasps)
(Zac laughs) As you’ve almost aging in front of them. You see that one of the
palimpsests glows in front of you. You see Riz burrowing into one. Another one, the last
one, with Zelda in it holds her hand out.
– Oh yeah, Zelda. – Zelda.
– Oh my god. – That’s going to be Fabian, that’s you. – Can I ask the Hangman how far he is? (laughs) Okay. – You’re near the fuse box.
– Master, I am here! – Turn off the fuse box.
– Yes! – But he doesn’t know that.
– I know. – Can I see the fuse box? – Make a perception check. – I mean. (laughs) – For a thing you don’t
know you’re looking for. – 15. – You see a bunch of stuff in this room. – Very cool.
– You riding? (engine revving) – Perception check on the prize box! – That’s where I should’ve been
doing the perception check. How far can I get with just a regular- I’m gonna action surge and get as deep into all of this as I can. – I’m gonna say that your
bike has a speed of 90, which is equal to 18 squares. It can take a move and a dash. So that’s 36 squares. Let’s count ’em out. One, two, three, four, five,
six, seven, eight, nine, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16,
17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30,
31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36. – Fantastic. – Fabian (mimics engine revving). (Emily cheers)
– Jesus! – I’m gonna need you to make
four charisma saving throws. (group shouts)
– Jesus Christ. – Jesus Christ, okay. (laughs) – Do you have Bless or anything? – I don’t, no. – Really?
– I missed all of that because I was – Oh my god.
– running the other way. – Do you wanna make them
all at the same time or individually? – No, I’ll make them individually ’cause it’s too scary to make them all. Okay, so first one. (die clatters) Six. – Six? Cool, you, this very first one right here. You and the hangman get
sucked right into it. – Jesus.
– You hear “Let’s race!” – Great. – You are deep in the video game. – That was a really valiant effort. – Really, really great.
– Thanks, dude, I had a real cool plan where I was gonna
throw that ninja sword directly into the machine. It was real nice of you to walk me all the way in
– Yeah, I was gonna say this – like I got to the room.
– is where you could’ve gone. – Yeah. – Cool, cool, cool.
– I remembered the traps after I counted it out, but that would’ve been
(beep) dope as hell. – Dope as hell, dude.
– That would’ve been super cool.
– That would’ve been so cool. – [Brennan] Kristen,
that’s gonna be your turn. – All right, I run straight in. I’m gonna have to make that– – Make that dexterity saving throw. – With Bless?
– With Bless. – Do I have any addition?
– Advantage, nope. – All right. (die clatters) Yeah (beep) yeah! I have negative three on dexterity, but I rolled an 18 with a one bless. – Yep, you’re through. – Then I’m gonna dash forward and I’m gonna jump on Gorgug’s back and hug him really tight and that means my guardians will be around both of us for this next. – Hell yeah.
– Are the guardians gonna hit the wiring?
– Can you use your healing word? – No, I used my dash as the action. – But this is a bonus action.
– But healing word is a bonus action.
– What’s that? – Oh yeah, yeah, cool. – You can use your
Healing Word if you want. – And this isn’t even Mass Healing Word, so this is a D4 and I add
a D4 for each spell slot, so I’ll make it a three because
I haven’t done any of those. Three D4s. – Hell yeah.
– Can I use yours? – Yes.
– Thanks. – Those two, you move
through those ghosts. – A two, a two, and a four. Hell yeah, that’s eight
plus what do I add to this? – 10, I think. – 10. 18.
– Okay. – And I take some healing,
but I don’t need it ’cause I’m still full
health ’cause God exists. (laughs) – I have 41 now.
– Cool. – Okay.
– You can thank God. Which God? – Simple.
– I don’t know yet. – Adaine, it’s gonna be your turn. – I gotta try and make that dex throw. – Yeah, go for it.
– Gotta get in that room. That’s where the action is happening. – We gotta blow up these wires.
– What are you talking about? The action’s happening
in the very first trap in the very first room. – Where you are? – Yes. – I made it. – Hell yeah!
– Nice. – 18. – You leap through, recognizing the spell, expertly dodging out of the way. You are in the room. – Do you have some sort of– – Hit the wires!
– I think we need to try to get these wires.
– Yes. – Can I do Witch Bolt
on the wires for that? – Can I do Witch Bolt
on the wires for that? – Yeah!
– I don’t have anything that will sever. Can I just use Mage Hand
to (beep) unplug the thing? Is it just in the wall? – I’m gonna ask you to make,
yeah, you can Mage Hand to try. – Or at least can I make
an arcana check and see? – Make a spell attack check. We’ll call it a DC20 spell attack check to just yank the (beep)
thing outta the room. – Okay, so I got a plus seven. – Well, it’s pretty low, right? On it’s health?
– Isn’t that four HP or something?
– It’s at 4. (players talking over one another) – But I don’t know if any of
my spells will attack a wire. – Do an arcana check to see if– – Can I do an arcana check to see if any of my spells with attack a wire? – You know what? I don’t know all your spells well enough. – Okay! – So you tell me what you’re gonna do. – (beep) – A spell attack would just hit it, right? A pure fireball or something.
– Witch Bolt sounds like it would. – There’s also the possibility
that you’re not severing, Witch Bolt might electrocute.
– If I’m not severing something I can just electrocute it. Hang on a second. If I use Mage Hand, can I
pull both of the palimpsests out of the thing or do I have to pick one? – (sighs) You have to pick one. – Dag (beep). – Obviously, right? – I’m gonna, I know. (moans) Why is this so hard? – Make the call.
– I know. – Or I’m gonna say the panic attacks catch on.
– Make it Riz! – (beep) Okay, I use Mage Hand to pull Riz out of the machine. – Cool, that’s gonna just be
a DC15 with your spell attack. Go ahead and roll. (dice clatters) – Eight plus seven is 15. – (exerts) Riz’s palimpsest
(Emily moans) goes shooting out of the
machine into your hand. Woo, baby. Fig, that’s gonna be you. You may make another
dexterity saving throw. – Is that gonna be my whole (beep) turn? – Hold on one second. Let me just see something here real quick. – I fail it anyways. (Ally laughs) (beep) me. – You take 11 points of damage as your illusory doppelganger is kicked the (beep) put of it. – Can I least do a spell on
my illusory doppelganger? – Kiss one of ’em! – I kiss myself. (Ally laughs)
– Now you have 14 left. – Whoops. Thanks for that. – Riz is pulled out of the device. You hear (mimics sound
waves), “Zelda downloaded”. (beep) – Sorry guys, it’s just in-game
that’s what I had to do. – You did the right thing.
– Appreciate it. – Does Biz start his turn by taking damage from my guardians? – Oh, he absolutely would. He’s gonna roll a saving throw. He rolls a nat 20. Go ahead and roll. – So it’s halved? – Halved, yeah. – (beep) An eight, a seven, and a five. – 20.
– 20. – So 10.
– 10. – You see that Biz looks
around at you and goes, “(laughs) Game over, game over! “It looks like you guys are free to go”. You see one of your
radiant guardians goes, “Man is condemned to be free” (exerts). And Biz hits the fucking deck, bam, out. – [Ally] Really? – Gone, toast. Half-damage.
– Does that mean that I’m no longer restrained by myself? – No longer restrained. – Thank (beep) god.
– Zelda downloaded? – Zelda was downloaded. Bring out the Box of Doom here. Fabian, in your video game
you hear, “Let’s race!” I’m gonna need you to
make an acrobatics check. – I’ll take this.
– This is a plus five. Go ahead and roll. – Does he have advantage since
he’s on a (beep) motorbike? – Yeah, we’ll say he has advantage. All right, you need to beat a nat 20. – I’ma go. You don’t need me here, right? I’m trapped in a video game. (Emily moans)
– You guys see two other palimpsests light up. – (beep) And then we gotta
(beep) these freaking things. – Wait, did you even try?
– Wait, she turns– – Can I try a nat 20?
– What if he rolls a nat 20? – Actually, that’s true. – He’s gonna roll a nat 20. – A nat 20 is insane.
– All right, here we go. – Too legit.
– We’ll go one at a time. – One at a time.
– Too legit to not. – One of these will be a nat 20. – Die number one. Roll the die.
– Die number one. – 10, nat 10.
– That’s half of a nat 20. – Half of that.
– All the way up to a nat 20! (group screaming) – Oh my god! – What? What? – What? (group laughing) – Get this outta here! (beep) yeah, fuck yeah!
– Fuck you! Suck my (beep)! – It doesn’t matter. All the girls are gone, but yeah! – What was that about those palimpsests?
– I feel like I’m on drugs. – I know.
– You explode out of the arcade. (Lou laughing)
(engine humming) Tear all the way around to the outside. (beep) You see that every single coin
machine in the entire arcade beep beep beep beep beep, you
are showered in gold coins all over you, all riches
of the arcade spill forth. – Sorry.
– Sorry. – What do you say to us when we see you? – God. – Where have you been?
– Where have you been? – Guys, you guys were all
there for my dad’s stuff and it’s just been getting to me, but I swear there were a
bunch of ghosts out front and I confronted them and dealt with them. – Thank you so much.
– Awesome, man, thank you. – (beep) Hey, we all have dad stuff. – We do. – Except for me.
– Except for Fig who’s super happy.
– I have two dads.
– Two dads. – They’re both great. – I’m stuck in a palimpsest right now? (Lou laughs) Cool.
– That’s correct. – I can’t even speak to them? – In your pocket. – “Honey, I Shrunk the Kids” style? – “Honey, I Shrunk the Kids” style, yep. – I can talk to them?
– Oh, sorry. – [Brian] No. – You are fully stuck
– Does (mumbles) – in the palimpsest, you cannot interact with the people outside of the palimpsest. – What about taking him out? Do you have Detect Thoughts? – I do. Can I–
– Or message (beep)? – Can I–
– Are we still fighting them? – We don’t know. No, it looks like– – The ghosts appear to be gone. – These guys are gone? – Oh yeah, ghosts disappear,
arcade returns to normal. – And Biz is just out? (beep) that (beep). – Can I, can you–
– Is Biz’s body there? – We just gotta–
– It’s on the ground. – You should stabilize.
– I would like to kill Biz. – No, we should stabilize Biz
– We have to use him to get him out.
– Because we need to get Riz out. – Let’s kill him.
– I think we kill him. – No!
– Wait! – Can I take my hands on either ear and then Burning Hands his brain? – No, you cannot do that! – I’m gonna physically
keep you from doing that. – Come on, let me at him! I wanna Burning Hands his brain.
– We need him, so we can figure out what’s going on. We gotta get Riz out. Let’s just take Riz to my parents’ house. – No, let’s stabilize Biz and (beep) intimidate
him to get him to get Riz out of this (beep) thing. – I gotta use him. I have Whispers of Terror. – Let’s stabilize him
– That’s gotta do – and we’ll intimidate him.
– something at some point. – And maybe have him use what we have in front of us to get– – If I have Whispers of Terror– – We could (sighs). – We haven’t been able to get someone out of the power source.
– You didn’t destroy the power source. We can–
– We severed the cords. We have to– – Fucking fine. – Try that.
– I’ll stabilize him. One, he gets one. – You go over the heal Biz, he’s dead. – Good. – He fully (beep). – Hands on his body.
– I was rolling death saves over here while you guys (beep). He’s fully dead.
– I know! I’m going to steal his soul. Mantle of Whispers him. – I have Revivify.
– Revivify? – No, no, no.
– Does Revivify, do you have a third level spell slot left? – I think I do. Yeah, I have one left. – Cool. (players talking over one another) – Let me just say this real
quick before we do this. Mantle of Whispers, I get their memories for the time that I inhabit them. – Only the memories that
enable you to casually. You don’t get deep secrets
with Mantle of Whispers. – All right, I guess revivify him. – Would she be able to casually get someone out of a palimpsest? Just chill. – In a chill way.
– Yeah, very cas, six cas. – If you wanna revivify him, you can. – We gotta. We can kill him again if we need to.
– We can kill him again. But let’s make sure he’s tied up and he can’t speak again. – Can I tie his wings together? – Sure. – Maybe blindfold him as well so he can’t see.
– I kick him really hard in the nuts and then I revivify him. – I still have those handcuffs. – Oh yes!
– Oh my god! – Beating (beep). – Nevermind. – [Emily] His wings are tied together. – Where did you get
handcuffs, you little freak? – I mean, they were–
– Do it, revive him. He’s gonna die.
– I also wanna pants him.
– Revivified. – I wanna pants him so
when he comes to life his pants are around his ankles. – (moans) What happened? – You human equivalent to a snot ball. – Oh my god.
– Is he handcuffed? – You are a little snot ball. – He’s in handcuffs.
– Yeah, he’s handcuffed. – Okay, so I wanna try,
I’ll just (beep) try to cast Suggestion on him. – Sure. – I’m gonna try to cast Suggestion on him. He has to do a wisdom saving throw and I wanna tell him to get
Riz out of the palimpsest or tell us how to get Riz
out of the palimpsest. – You see he goes, “You
think I’m, well, you think”. He starts to look at his little hands. Are his hands in front of him or behind him when you cuff him? – We can do in front. – You see he goes,
– What do you guys think? – “You think I’m so stupid “that I’m gonna take this palimpsest. “I’m gonna walk it over to this port, ” put it (mimics electric
fizzing) into the port, “type on here (mimics sound waves)”. Riz appears in the room. And get Riz out of here? (beep) no! – Wow, you’re stupid. – No! – I put my hands on him. – [Group] Wait, wait, wait! – Grab her, grab her, grab her. I put my gun to his head. Those girls are going to the AV Club. What happens to them once they get there? Five, four, three, two– – (stuttering) Please. – Shoot a finger off. Bam!
(Brennan screaming) – The wall, god.
– This is in no way okay. – What happens? What happens to the girls? Five, four, three, two, one.
– Two, one. – Bam, another finger off!
(Brennan screaming) – Where did the girls go?
– I get excited by the counting and I help count. – A, B, C, D.
– Stop, everyone stop. Okay, we’re gonna go slower this time. I’m gonna give you 20
full seconds to tell me and this time I’m gonna
blow your (beep) head off. Did you just kill my friend? What did you do? – I Burning Hands his crotch. (Brennan screaming) – Guys, we turned into real bullies. – What happens to them?
– No, he’s the bully. – He’s a monster. – There are rules against this. This is a war crime.
– What happens to them? – This is a war crime. – Yeah, we are at war.
– I’m going to cut your head off! (Emily laughs)
(Brennan screams) – What happens to Zelda and Penny?
– What happened to the girls? – Okay, okay, the girls
are downloaded into a body. They’re back in their bodies now, okay? – Their own bodies? – Their own bodies.
– What? – The palimpsest is for storing them beyond divination, okay? If I were to have a morsel such as yourself in a palimpsest– – I just smack him.
– Oh my god, this– (beep)
(slapping) – What is–
– Fully unconscious. – Go back.
– Fully unconscious again. – (beep) This is a (beep) spank bank.
– Heal him. Heal him.
– He’s making a (beep) spank bank. Is that what he’s doing?
– No, heal him. Wake him up.
– Please, Riz. – I’m gonna use my healer
kit to bring him back. Give him one HP. I give him one.
(Brennan gasps) – Eight, he gets eight from me. We can hit him a few more times. – I’m not a bad guy! – Then go back, you are an awful guy.
– Yes, you are. You’re a absolute–
– You’re an awful guy. – Okay, I’m gonna just walk
over here ’cause I’m furious. – What–
– so mad. – Okay, they get back in their bodies. What happens then? – Dude, girls never gave me a shot. – So they get back in their bodies. What happens now? – Riz, I’m telling you what happens. Tell me if this is incorrect. I’m intimidating him. Tell me.
– I’m gonna cast Detect Thought so I can hear
him as she asks questions. – Go ahead an give me an arcana check. – I’m biting my staff. – Tell me if this is correct. You are basically downloading
them onto a computer, they go back into their bodies, but now you can do
whatever you want with them on some sort of computer. – I got a 21 arcana check. – A 21 arcana check?
– Yes. – You see the memory Biz has of downloading these young women and there are memories of him
deciding that this was a plan he wanted to do. That this was his big evil plan. That memory is false. – Somebody–
– Someone changed it, your sister Aelwen. – Somebody, (beep) Aelwen again. (beep) – This just got (beep) pinned on him. – (beep) You suck!
– And now we’re all here. – What’s that?
– You suck. – No, I don’t. I rule, dude. – No, you absolutely don’t. – Oh, you’re a virgin. She detected you’re a virgin, hon. – [Emily] Virgin. – Okay, I am–
– She uses that spell to target people that she can use. – I have a girlfriend in the Dune Fort and we have hooked up. – Boy or (beep) gnome? (laughing) – I feel really bad.
– Why did she use virgins? – I feel really bad he was a pawn, so I take my hand and where I
originally did Burning Hands, and I do a Healing Word. – Stop touching–
– You touch his (beep). – No, no, it’s Healing
Word, it’s not touch. – Okay.
– From afar. – You see his (beep) glows for a second. (chiming) – I’m so sorry. I didn’t realize you were–
– I’m gonna use my (beep) healer kit and just try to
– Just stick his fingers back on.
– sew his fingers back on. (Emily laughs) So sorry. I do D6 plus four. I heal him for eight while charmed and fix his fingers.
– We’ve been completely had by this. – But he still sucks. – You really–
– Maybe. – You shot off two of
his fingers, the ball. You have to live with that. – Can we go as fast as we can?
– Wait, wait, wait. – Can we go through this to get to–
– Hang on a second. Riz. – Biz.
– Biz. – I’m Riz. – I’m sorry. It’s very confusing.
– It’s okay. – I’m reading your mind right now. – Okay. – I want you to give me
permission to delve deeper to see if I can figure out
who did this to you, okay? – Okay. – Because you suck, but
they suck more, okay? – Okay. – Please don’t think about anything creepy while I’m dong it. – Well, now you’ve ruined that. – Well (beep). – Happening now.
– I just– – I (beep) been shot and
had my crotch burned off and then healed. – And now you–
– Hey, how’s your mom, Biz? Is your mom good? Your grandma, is she cool? – Is your Detect Thoughts active?
– I have my Detect Thoughts. So Detect Thoughts,
surface, they can’t tell, but for deeper things they can tell. But if he knows already– – The intense sexual stuff
he was just thinking about and then you mentioning his mom. All you see is him riding his mom around with a little cowboy hat on.
– Oh god. (Lou laughs)
– Oh, that’s (beep). – Oh my god. – You keep mention, you
mentioned (beep) and then my mom. How was I not going to synthesize?
– Do you know my sister Aelwen? – You go (banging) and hit a place in his memory that’s been sewn off. – Goddamn it.
– What are the girls for? – He doesn’t know. He thinks it’s for some spank bank. – What about Penelope Everpetal? Anything in there? – You dig deeper into his mind. You see Penelope talking to him. He has a lot of memories
of speaking to Penelope. – Why are you speaking to Penelope? She’s cool. – I’m cool, too. You delve into his mind,
finding these memories that have been cut out all
over his mental imagery. You are able to trace this spell back to the other day before the Hudall party. Meaning that these modifications to his memory were recent and as a result of fear that
somebody was getting close to discovering whatever
this conspiracy was. – (beep). – Johnny Spells’ burner phone pings. (pinging) – I take it out, I take it out. (Brennan mimics pinging) Is it ringing or is it getting texts? – It gets six messages. – Okay, I’ll look at them. I turned the read
receipts off a while ago. – You see a picture of
the Thistlespring tree, the Abernant home, the front
door of Sklonda’s apartment, (beep) door of Gilear’s apartment,
the Applebee’s residence, and Seacaster Manor. – Pictures of? – [Brennan] Pictures of them. – I say “l-o-l, what?” – No! (laughs) – You see another text appear. This is from a number you don’t recognize It’s not Zane’s phone. You see it says, “Think very carefully “about your next decisions.” And that’s all for this
week on “Fantasy High”. – Oh, goddamn it. They can burn my (beep) house down. I don’t give a (beep). (video scratches) – You hear choppers and the
parking lot is full of cops. You’re all under the arrest for
the murder of Johnny Spells. – We’re coming!
– Yeah! – We are compliant in
whatever you are requesting. – Guys, I always thought
I had daddy issues, but I’m starting to think
I have mommy issues. – I would never let any man speak to me the way I’m speaking to you right now! Let’s make some (beep) bacon! – Nothing wrong with that.
(gun firing) (group shouting) – Let’s go! – Do you wanna go to prom with me, Mom? – Kiddo, I was so afraid you’d ask. (laughing) – Can I cast Detect Thoughts on myself? – Your phones start
pinging left and right. (group screams) – This is gonna be a nightmare. – It couldn’t have been any other way. (laughs) That’s it for this
chapter of “Dimension 20”. But wait! What harkens on the wind? (mimics bird cawing) Speak to me, bird. More full episodes of
Dropout.tv’s own “Dimension 20” available with a free trial that you could sign up for today? Hopefully our viewers are brave
enough to answer the call. (mimics bird cawing) There he goes. – Figueroth Faeth, Gorgug
Thisltespring, Adaine Abernant, Fabian Aramaris Seacaster,
Kristin Applebees, Riz Gukgak. – It’s actually Figueroth
Faeth Insatiable. – You’re all under the arrest for the murder of Johnny Spells.